Wedding Song - God Knew That I Needed You

Showing posts with label widow health widow healing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label widow health widow healing. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 7, 2021

NEW ADVENTURES ~ Napavine & Chehalis

The day started out pretty energetic.

I woke up early … so I filled the coffee basket with fresh ground coffee, and plugged Grandma Smalley’s percolator in; the heavenly odor of flavored coffee beans wafted through the kitchen with the enticing scent of the marinade I was preparing for my chicken Supper, later on.

Yogurt & Spiced Chicken prepped to marinade in 'fridge for a couple hours.

Then it turned bad … but it morphed into something good as the tires on the Highlander ate up mile after mile of roadway.

Around 9 AM, I poured the perked coffee into Bob's heavy duty thermos to keep it hot; then I called the Emergency Physicians Inc., in calimexarabia to ask why they keep sending me threatening letters when I have been mailing them payments since January 13th. I was told by an outsourced person (who kept saying, ‘can you hold for a moment’), that they haven’t received any payment. I repeated again, that I have been sending payment every month since January – and I have documentation to prove it (copies of the bill statement as well as my payment/receipts of postage dates). She kept repeating that she is not seeing that payment has been received. I asked her if they are not receiving mail at their office; she said that no, they haven’t been. So, I said, “Then the problem is not on my end – the problem is on your end; and you better get it figured out, because I do not want this to go to collection agency because of your negligence on your end.” She said, if you can send me a picture of your payments, I can clear this up.” To which I replied, “If you are not collecting or opening your mail to receive my payments, I’m pretty sure you will not be seeing the pictures you want me to send either. So, here’s what’s gonna happen … I will send yet another payment, but this time, I will send it with a confirmation request: I want someone’s hands to sign for receiving it. And if I get another letter like this one, I will hire a Lawyer to settle it once and for all. This is ridiculous".

Well, that got her attention.

She started backtracking. 

What she said next had me counting to ten …

She said, “Well, we do get mail at the office, but I do not see that we have received anything from you.”

I couldn’t believe my ears!

A few minutes ago, she said they have not been receiving mail at their office.

I said, “Then you better check again. Because it is hard for me to believe that out of all the mail you suddenly remember receiving, mine is the only mail that has been consistently ‘must have been lost in the mail’ for 4 fricking months! Like I said, I have documentation that I have sent payment since January 13th.”

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2021/01/chaotic-day.html; https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2021/02/between-rains.html ... and 2 more scanned mailings which I am not sharing here because of personal information)

I hung up because I was getting steamed up, and I was tired of the outsourced office drone parroting scripted sentences.

I am tired of the covid nonsense.

I got dressed, washed my hair … and drove into town to the Post Office to mail off another payment envelope again.

My foot was on the gas petal, but I really didn’t need fossil fuel to get that thing moving; the car was cruising through downtown on my steam, alone.

I hadn’t even got to enjoy my morning coffee, yet.

I was hungry.

And I was seriously pissed.

Thankfully, I was able to nip into a parking spot close to the P.O. building.

Blessedly, there was only myself and 2 other people (it was that early, that all the calimexarabia bullshit started): I was able to transact my business quickly.

Sending a certified payment to the outsourced CA Dr's. This is bullshit nonsense.
I better not get another snotty notice from these educated moron 'heros'.

Leaving the city center, I knew I needed to unwind – and relax.

Fast.

To defuse.

When I get this worked up, I need to get away: everything feels like it is pressing in on me.

I knew if I went home, I’d just stew about calimexarabia’s nonsense that centers around covid insanity.

I hear a country road calling my name ...
11 AM. SW gas $3.19 a gallon. I ran thru about $7.00 of it by 4 PM.

I really had no plans – I just wanted to get out of town … and as far away from people as I could reasonably get with a bum leg.

I let the car have its way with the road stretched out before it.

Virginia Way from Longview. 8 mins

By the time I reached Bond Road, I kinda knew what I wanted to do.

Bond Road, Kelso from Virginia Way. 13 mins. (backroad to Castle Rock - off Ostrander)

I wanted to spread my wings and fly – without relying on written notations (which were at home because I hadn’t planned a daytrip venture).

I turned off into Castle Rock … and onto Napavine.

To explore something new.

Something I had not ever experienced with Bob: we had passed through Napavine, but we had never done what I was planning to do when I got there today.

Evaline, WA from Bond Road, Kelso. 34 mins
Logging at Evaline; ugly logging 'eco-friendly' pyramid pyres; Schoolhouse Road.
Map MAP Napavine from Evaline. 4 mins
Mayme Shaddock Park, Napavine.
Walking above the railroad tracks.
The tracks are still active ...
One part of the end trail leads to another part of Napavine.
Just a short distance away, the end of the trail circles back ... or leads into a town street.
A pretty painted garden box - there were 4 of them lined up in a row.
A short, but fun walk.

The walk felt good.

And my leg was behaving.

I was feeling adventurous.

Working off a head of steam can make me feel adventurous: curiosity redirects my thoughts and keeps me too busy to feed the anger.

I wanted to walk a hiking trail a bit down the road; I wanted to explore a new section of the Willapa Hills Trail that I had never done with Bob. We had walked one side of the trail … but not the side I was planning on walking today.

Willapa Hills Trail from Napavine. 13 mins
Willapa Hills Trail.
Little pond along the Willapa Hills Trail.
This section of the paved lengthy Willapa Hills Trail is about a mile and a half long.
Willapa Hills Trail - from Chehalis to South Bend; 56 miles long.
The Willapa Hills Trail crosses several rivers - over abandoned railroad tracks.
The Chehalis River crosses under the boarded tracks of the Willapa Hills Trail in Chehalis.
The earthy smell of creosote on the rail timbers beneath the trail boards. The Willapa Hills Trail.
A farm machinery graveyard. LOL. I could see the Hillcrest Food Mart from this angle of the trail.
Old Highway 603. Scenic - a nice country drive.

I like this trail. 

I enjoyed myself on the solo lobo jaunt.

I’ll come back later this year and rewalk the section Bob and I used to walk.

I figured 3 miles hiking (the 2 walks combined), was enough on my leg today. It was behaving, but it also needs to be used gently for the time being – I was sitting in Lakeshore Clinic yesterday afternoon because it was hurting; so, I have to pamper it for a while.

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2021/04/god-help-me.html)

Moderation is the name of the game. 

The anger had backed down … I had explored new places/new activities … it was time to point the car’s nose towards home.

I made a backroad loop back home through Chehalis – along Jackson Highway – through Toledo, Castle Rock, and Delameter to Coal Creek; which drops me into my backyard.

Snow-topped temperamental Mt. St. Helens, and her frosted sister Cascade peaks. Jackson Highway coming into Toledo.
A cart stacked with racks of antlers. Toledo. Truck took the crossover road towards Toutle.
More road work at Castle Rock end of Delameter Road.
This road pilot was acting very strangely ...
At first, I thought he had to make a quick pit stop to empty his bladder. Things got weirder.
Very strange behavior from both of them.
Laying blacktop.
The necessities ruin the view. And that man-made-hill is an eye-sore. Road work all the way to Melton Rd.

I enjoyed the day’s outing; but I was also glad to be home – the drive, itself, was 3 hours long (round trip).

There were no hidden surprises in the mailbox.

And I was anticipating the new adventure my taste buds would enjoy.

Grilling Supper in my Panni Grill; Yogurt & Spice Chicken.
Yogurt & Spice Chicken with a tossed green salad.

My supper was delicious 😊

Now, I am going to enjoy a movie … and then shuffle off to Buffalo (go to bed) 😉


Thursday, December 17, 2020

TIMELY

About a month ago, when my leg started misbehaving, I determined to find ways to deal with the thing organically and holistically … and I set goals for a timely recovery.

I am healing nicely, and the goals are on target 😉

Last night we had power surges during the rainy downfall, so I shut the laptop down and chose a new book to read 😊

Familiar author – new read.

When Bob was still working before retirement, he brought a book home in his lunch pail one morning when his shift ended: I was curious and read the back storyline while repacking his lunch pail for his night shift.

I was intrigued.

Bob turned me onto Clive Cussler books a decade ago ... I was hooked with the first book.
Spending the night with Clive is a pleasure. LOL

This morning I woke up feeling refreshed and motivated, so I got dressed and drove to Baker’s Corner where I grabbed a Breakfast Burger (I was really after the Breakfast Casserole, but that was gone already) and a Vanilla Coke, and drove to Willow Grove.

I am not going to allow myself to become limited by what some consider a handicap.

As long as I am capable of being actively mobile … I intend to be actively mobile.

I had planned to walk the upper end of the dike for my first day out and about, but after reading several chapters of Clive’s book last night: the river walk seemed more fitting.

Plus, Willow Grove is closer – if I got a sciatic pinch in my hip/thigh; or an arthritic shin cramp (which feels like a burning charley horse when it sets in), getting home to lie down and calm it all down, would be quicker … and safer; being only 8 minutes away from my driveway.

I tend to push the envelope every chance I get; but I am no fool.

I don’t play fast and loose with my life, or my body: even if some think I do.

Bob was the daredevil of the family.

I’m more of the mindset to take things easy, let healing set in, test the boundaries … then step out lightly and carefully before going full throttle.

So today, I tested the boundaries; setting out lightly and carefully 😉

I chose Willow Grove for my walk because I am reading a book about ships ...
A half a mile walk will suffice for my 1st day out.
Windy ... but almost balmy in temperature.
2 ships anchored - waiting for Port admittance further upriver.
A seagull sitting on a wave break post.
Half a mile in half an hour.

When I got back home, I tried to upload the pics/vids I took during my morning walk … and was frustrated when they were rerouted to another section of the laptop innards I can’t decipher.

This would not be an issue with Bob.

I am not Bob: it was an issue.

I shot off a pissed text to my granddaughter, asking her if she knew of a way to untangle the updated mess Microsoft and Apple had tossed me; she was working, but she did get back to me when she could ... and I am able to post my pics/vids again. 

In the meantime, as I was waiting and fuming; I was sitting in Bob’s recliner (it felt so good! I have not been able to sit in it for a month because sitting was painful) contemplating the frustration … when I happened to glance out the window and saw a ‘hang 5’ toggle cloud gently glide by, high in the sky.

Even now, Bob is STILL my greatest cheerleader! Thanks Babe ~ OX

I laughed.

Bob’s loving comfort always comes through in timely methods.

I swear Bob was riding the clouds and seeing my fierce eyes, decided to shoot me some loving encouragement.

This is not the first time he has given me signs he is near (hang 5 toggle clouds, and clouds parting overhead in a heart shaped opening; finding heart-shaped rocks): they always appear when I need comfort.

I am comforted.

And I do not think this comforting is at odds with our Christian Faith.

I never put my love for Bob, over Elohei.

I do not – nor have I ever, idolized Bob.

I believe Elohim is okay with the signs.

In Elohei, live and breathe; and have my being.

I trust my life 100% to Elohim.

Yeshua is my Husband, now.

I am stepping out, and settling up, in my new life: with that mindset.

I am able to do what I can do in the moment because I walk by Faith, knowing Elohim has everything under control and has only good things in store for my life.

Today was an excellent start in a timely mode.

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

IT’S ALL UPHILL

“It’s all uphill” is a phrase that can be taken 1 of 2 ways …

For the time being, ‘it’s an uphill battle’ is daunting, and it doesn’t seem like an encouraging prospect.

On the other hand, ‘it’s all uphill’ can be a good thing, because better things/happier times lay ‘just over the horizon’: it’s good to keep a positive outlook 😊

Challenges can make or break us – I will never be broken; so, the only other option is to let the circumstances and situations of the past 23 months … including this painful physical event ‘make me’: I can do that 😉

I purposefully cull people who use their fear to browbeat me into their way of thinking – I DO what is BEST FOR ME. Regardless of what others may think.
I believe in the power of prayer/divine healing; if people can’t respect that … they gotta go.

My mantra the last few days is, “Pray healing in; breathe pain out”: I plead the blood, and reminded Elohim that I am healed by Yeshua’s stripes. Of course, neither Elohim, nor Yeshua, need reminding … but I needed the affirmation; so, I quoted the Scriptures, and stood on them.

Pleading the blood is not begging Elohim to do something; the something has already been done.

Pleading the blood simply means I am actively activating the promise of my healing by the sacrifice price Yeshua paid 2020 years ago; it’s my statement of absolute faith I have in Calvary’s purchase through Yeshua’s eternal love for me – I am greatly loved, and highly favored … and I rely on Yeshua, as my Husband to provide for my well-being: spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

His blood spilled so freely on Calvary, is better than any insurance the world system has to offer!

I have lived my life like this since 1965; Elohei has never let me down.

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZjYnyz42mHQ)

Job 1, Isaiah 53:5, Jeremiah 17:14, and Mark 10:52.

I refuse to live life as a handicapped cripple.

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a6CJrGjATII)

Bob didn’t – and I won’t.

So help me God.

There is power in the blood; blood is the lifeforce – it fortifies … and even hospitals infuse blood as a purifying agent to the body.

I choose the blood of Yeshua.

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NErE5B2-3-4)

I have been lying in bed most of the past few days, to soothe the inflammation, and allow my body to fully recuperate. I’ve done research for organic and holistic alternatives to prednisone and ibuprofen: and it’s doable. Also, have been thinking of ways to modify and alter my lifestyle to manage the pain … and that is doable too, without too much alterations.

I’ve always been operating at turbo-speed, now I need to slow things down a bit.
Laundry adjustments, yesterday afternoon ... just turning the laundry basket upside down, and folding things on it, eliminates the need to bend and fold; right now.

One immediate change that came quickly to mind, was to call my BIL and ask him if he wants the rain barrels – they gotta go. Bob bought them for me in 2017, and built me stands to place them on; for my garden area … and it will be hard to part with them because they were love gifts to me from my husband; but man-handling the stands, setting the barrels up, and hauling lots of buckets of water back and forth between barrels and raised beds will exasperate this new issue. So, they gotta go.

He’ll take them, and they will have a good home. He also said he could lay a layer of pea gravel down for me along the length of the raised beds, so I will have an easier time gardening: the bulky river rock is nice for landscaping but it is hell to walk on. I was thankful he offered to do that (I had no idea he would even go there 😉); he is a good man, like Bob.

My prednisone and ibuprofen schedule is 10 AM & 10 PM; and I’ve been laying flat on my back, massaging my left leg until 10 AM, when I can medicate the pain … this morning, when I woke up around 5 AM, I decided to walk around every room in the house despite the pain (I need to keep my joints limber, and the blood flowing in my leg veins): being totally bedridden is never a good thing, as it breaks the body down in several ways that can lead to other medical complications. I also drank a cup of green tea with honey.

Green tea helps reduce inflammation in the body; I had a cup this morning before I dressed and went downtown.

I did another lap around the house – and noticed the pain had backed off enough that I was not checking the time every 20 minutes 😉

Elohim is faithful.

I had medical forms I had to fill out and get approved, so I drove into town, to the hospital to drop them off … only to be told, the department I needed no longer operates at the hospital; the paperwork has to be mailed in, or faxed into the regional Office, in Vancouver.

So, I mailed the forms in. 

Post Office Lobby line; Longview.

At this point – after walking all around my house twice, driving into town … then making numerous laps (and burning gas by the $$ making those laps) around the hospital building to find a freed-up parking space, and walking uphill (a NO-NO! the doc warned me against) to get onto the building (all other hospital access routes have been fenced off with chain-link security fences); my leg was starting to burn, and there was no way I was going to further run all over town to hunt a fax machine down!

But I was peeved: I had asked Danielle, at this time last year, if the hospital was going to go into shut-down mode – and she said “no; the hospital will always be operational, and this department will always be here”. She flat-out lied. And I knew it because it was obvious then that the hospital was running on a skeleton crew, and half the Financial Department has already been shifted to Vancouver. Now that department is totally gone.

Longview is dying.

insleeze has destroyed the economy with the stupid and ridiculous political demonrat agendas that are not rooted in reality; fantasy is not reality. Prison towns and welfare states do not generate financial securities – and qualified doctors refuse to work here: we were told by concerned doctors in ER, before Bob was moved to OHSU in 2018, that good surgeons would not even consider coming because there was no money to be made here. I was seriously pissed and gave the hospital a good piece of my mind – Bob was too critical, and he would not have survived the ambulance drive to Salem. That doctors would put $$$$$ ahead of their Hippocratic Oath is scandalous.

Doctors really do believe they are gods.

The only ‘doctors’ that work here are a triage skeleton crew: basically, field doctors. Anything serious – like Bob’s condition, and they will be honest and tell you they are out of their depth; sending critical patients to Vancouver, Portland, or Salem.

Most do not survive the trip.

Which makes my petition for divine healing all the more pressing.

And, if it be Elohim’s Will for my life … I will be: Elohim has already healed me of shoulder bursitis in 1987; and scoliosis back pain in 2008; and night blindness in 2016. So, when this intense pain - like noting I had ever expierienced before; flared up 12 days ago, fibromyalgia did come to mind: and I rejected that thought!

Fibromyalgia.
Scoliosis.

I will not live my life in fear; any type of fear.

So, when the doctor assessed the pain as ‘age-related’, I was actually relieved.

And I knew I could deal with that 😉 

I’m actually not fat – I’m in the ‘safe zone’ weight-wise for a 5’2” Senior woman. But I do want to shed at least another 10-15 pounds for my bone’s sake.

It’s no surprise to me that I am aging; I only have to look in the mirror … or at my skin that is losing its luster and elasticity: I didn’t notice these things before becoming a widow, because Bob always told me I was his ‘beautiful lady’. But in the course of 23 months/9 days/8 hours & 37 minutes, my hair has been significantly glitterized with an abundance of silvery shine – and my skin is showing wear and tear (which has been accentualized by the weight loss 23 months has wrought). Aging doesn’t bother me … it’s a natural course of life.

What does bother me though, is racking up a huge ER Bill just to be told that my body is aging.

DUH: I am 64. 

I just didn’t expect the breath-sucking pain. 

I’ve always taken care of my body: I was unprepared for the physical searing.

I’ve out-lived my mother’s parents, my father’s mother, and my mother … I had nothing to draw on, concerning old-age issues.

When I got back home, the pain had backed down enough that I swept the floors that had been ignored for the past 12 days (my military upbringing was making me feel like a guilty slob)

… and I pulled the Fall decorations, replacing them with Christmas decorations … nothing fancy or intricate, because I don’t want to set my healing backwards; just quick, simple, and easy on the body switch-outs 😉

Christmas Cornucopia.
I made this wreath to celebrate Christmas in our new home – I had no idea that I would be a widow at Christmas time in 2018.
( https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2017/11/away-we-go-and-ho-ho-ho.html)
Wreath & Seasonal Coir mat is all I am doing for Christmas 2020: it is enough this year.
I pulled the little dolly hauler, Bob bought me for my Bazaar Circuits, from the shed; and placed it in the car. It will tear up the steps … but it will save me from this intense pain.
I made 2 wreaths for our new home; 1 for each entry door. Hanging them every year is bittersweet now.
Front Porch; that's it for this year.
Christmas Ducks; nothing fancy, but a little festive 😉

I also received news that I have a traveling companion! I know this person, and we will have good times together.

We are already making tentative plans for the Spring of 2021 😊

I have a GOOD GOD!

At the end of every day, I know I have a good life.

And I have good people in my life: I am blessed and thankful.