MOTES & Country Crust Bread Recipe

Wow.

That’s was my first thought when I read what another widow had posted to me.

Just … ((((WOW)))).

So, I had been on FB earlier in the morning – checking my personal Page, answering replies to my Blog posts, and making my way through other widow posts on the 2 groups I am still a part of: that may change, and I may minus 1 Group after talking to the Moderator concerning this issue.

This Group is supposed to be a ‘Safe Place’, where widows can open up and talk about stuff as they would with their spouse … if their spouse were still here.

Maybe some widows had critical husbands – and they picked up that bad habit.

Maybe some are just plain mean, and don’t know how to play nice.

I’m not used to either type of behavior.

I’ve had a good life with my best friend.

Bob was eye candy, and even after we married, Bob never stopped being my ‘boy friend’ – he never made me feel ‘less than’.

Bob never treated me badly or unkindly.

Bob was my best friend as well as my lover, my husband, my soulmate. I am finding it very difficult to trust people who tell me they want to be friends – when they have a mean spirit.

I wrap myself in the memories of that warmth every day since the Fall/Winter of 2018 …

And I don’t tolerate it from anyone else: I never have.

I will shut it down and slap a damper on it as soon as they start their shit with me.

A posted statement was made that came off as judgmental; concerning grief … and what people consider grief worthy.

I have my own opinions about the things people compare to widow grief; I don’t agree with most of it, but I keep my opinions on those topics to myself.

Why kick someone when they are already on the ground?

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vlwXfcFMO3w)

I said that people should not be judged for grieving – and I gave my 2 reasons why.

My reply was short, and kind.

Kind – but firm, given the topic.

I was being considerate: I could have said more – and I usually do.

But this is a Group for Widows: some may have lost their spouse to covid – I am trying to be compassionate.

Some; like this woman who flat out told me I wasn’t welcome and needed to leave the Group, are making it hard.

Mind you … obamanites by their own admissions demand ‘solidarity grieving’ for every damned thing under the sun: BUT the widowing obamanites are drawing a line in the sand about where widows are “allowed to grieve/how they are allowed to grieve/and why” only the obamanites are allowed to politically grieve the past 4 years; and no one else is allowed to politically grieve now.

Anyway …

I’m getting ahead of myself.

After I posted my short and kind reply to a loaded query … I logged off FB and took care of personal business on the home-front.

I started laundry.

I noticed the frosty rooftops.

Frosty rooftops this morning.

I put shoes and coat on, and transferred the chrysanthemums from the front porch steps into the house, to overwinter safely.

Brought chrysanthemums inside; clipped the frost-limp bits, and placed them in front of a free window: as you can see most windows in the livingroom have plants placed before them to catch the spotty sunlight.

I thumbed through cookbooks to find a bread recipe I was wanting to bake – I hadn’t baked this particular bread in years; I’ve been satisfactorily experimenting with other bread recipes – but, this morning, I woke up wanting to revisit this one 😉

And looking into the cupboard, I noticed my flour supply was short of what I needed to make a double batch of bread: I needed to haul out the large bag of flour and break it down …

Time to break the flour bag down – 7 & ½ 12-cup baggies

Flour replenished in the cupboard, I gathered the other ingredients and got busy.

This recipe makes up quickly.

The activity burns time prodcutively.

The crust is delightfully crisp; but not too crunchy.

The delicious body of the bread bakes up light and fluffy like store-bought Wonder Bread … but not as cloyingly marshmallowy (I don’t like store-bought Wonder Bread because it sticks to the back of my teeth); Bob liked Wonder Bread, but when I started baking bread, he preferred my homemade loaves.

The bread slices beautifully.

It tastes like you’ve spent half a day on it.

This is a good bread recipe 😊

==COUNTRY CRUST BREAD ~2 loaves

2 packages active dry Yeast * 2 cups warm Water (105- to 115-degrees) * ½ cup Sugar * 1 Tablespoon Salt * 2 Eggs * ¼ cup Vegetable Oil * 6 to 6½ cups all-purpose Flour * Vegetable Oil, Margarine, or Butter softened

Dissolve yeast in warm water in a large mixing bowl. Stir in sugar, salt, eggs, ¼ cup oil, and 3 cups flour: beat until smooth. Mix in enough remaining flour to make dough easy to handle.

Turn dough onto a lightly floured surface; knead until smooth and elastic – 8 t 10 minutes.

Kneading bread dough. 

Place in a greased bowl and turn greased side up (at this point, dough can be refrigerated 3 to 4 days). Cover; let rise in a warm place until doubled: about 1 hour (dough is ready if indentation remains when touched).

Punch dough down; divide into halves. Roll each half into a rectangle, 18” x 9” – roll up tightly, beginning at 9” side. Press with thumbs to seal after each turn. Pinch edge firmly to seal bottom seam. Place loaf, seam side down, in greased baking pan, 9”x5”x3”. Brush with oil. Let rise until double – about 1 hour.

Loaves formed.

2nd rise; I rise my loaves atop the dryer when I do laundry.

Loaf pans under a laundry basket, covered with one of Bob’s ex-large bath sheets. It works for me 😉

Heat oven to 375-degrees. Bake until loaves are golden brown and sound hollow when tapped on the bottom – about 30 to 35 minutes.

Loaves baking.

Remove from bread pan. Brush with margarine; cool on wire racks.

Beautiful loaves.

Between laundry loads and bread risings, I meandered back to FB off and on.

During one of the ‘on’ moments, I noticed I had a notice of activity … so I checked it out, and was flat out told by another widow, who took umbrage to my reply, that I needed to leave the Group.

This woman is not a Moderator.

She was pissed off because – in her words – I “do not understand difference between widow grieving and political grieving”.

She intimated that I was pretty stupid.

She said ‘no one is judging anyone’ … WHILE JUDGING ME.

Typical obamanite bullshit tactics.

She did not fully read my reply.

She cherry picked tidbits to justify her arrogantly ignorant biased response.

I don’t need that; I have my own stuff to wade through.

And there really is no excuse for widows to go after each other in cat-fight mode.

I don’t have time for it; I don’t make time for it.

I am not going to accept bad behavior.

I want people in my life I can be me with, without hassle & censure because they are butt hurt.

I blocked her.

I refuse to be dumped on.

I’ve had enough of that periodic crap from the kids, grandkids, in-laws’ (spouse’s family), by-laws (birth family), outlaws (friends and acquaintances), ect.

I accepted a lot of bullshit for Bob's sake.

To keep the peace; and keep stressors at bay.

But Bob is no longer here.

I will not accept it anymore: from anyone.

About anything.

Especially from a stranger with biased angst.

I came across a post questioning the legitimacy of comparing widowhood grieving to ‘political grieving’.

The author of the original post had her say, and she asked what others thought …

I replied that both are acceptable.

I gave my 2 reasons why.

I said that I am a widow grieving the loss of my husband … and I am also an American, grieving the loss of my country.

Both are legitimate grievances.

I love them both.

I am saddened by the loss of both.

And NO ONE GETS TO TELL ME OTHERWISE.

I do not give anyone the right to a self-righteous-feel-good-motey high at my expense.

It's another widowing learning curve with blind curve risks and casualties.