MY LIFE – MY WAY

“I counted my years and found that I have less time to live from here on than I have lived up to now.

I feel like that child who won a packet of sweets: he ate the first with pleasure, but when he realized that there were few left, he began to enjoy them intensely.

I no longer have time for endless meetings where statutes, rules, procedures and internal regulations are discussed, knowing that nothing will be achieved.

I no longer have time to support the absurd people who, despite their chronological age, haven't grown up.

My time is too short: I want the essence; my soul is in a hurry. I don't have many sweets in the package anymore.

I want to live next to human people, very human, who know how to laugh at their mistakes and who are not inflated by their triumphs and who take on their responsibilities. Thus, human dignity is defended and we move towards truth and honesty.

It is the essential that makes life worth living.

I want to surround myself with people who know how to touch hearts, people who have been taught by the hard blows of life to grow with gentle touches of the soul.

Yes, I'm in a hurry, I'm in a hurry to live with the intensity that only maturity can give.

I don't intend to waste any of the leftover sweets. I am sure they will be delicious, much more than what I have eaten so far.

My goal is to reach the end satisfied and at peace with my loved ones and my conscience.

We have two lives and the second begins when you realize you only have one. "

***************

My sentiments exactly – all my life : more so since Bob went Home. I just don't have time to waste anymore on nonsense

I'm going to live life to the fullest.

MY WAY.

RAINY SHABBAT

We finally got rain!

While I listened to the rain fall, I did 5 loads of laundry (I do laundry every 2 weeks to make full loads); and worked on another preemie gown, until sundown.

I also watched a movie:

Kathy Bates & Tom Skeritt – ‘Bonneville’ movie: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZqp8uuDQr0)

I never saw it before; and I could have done without the push of the mormon religion threaded through the movie – but other than that, it was enjoyable as the rain softly fell outside my window: I like Kathy Bates, and I recognized the truck driver’s arm without seeing his face 😉 I knew it was Tom (I watch movies a lot 😊 while I’m crafting). The scattering of the ashes was predictable from the get-go. I should have done that, and saved myself a 3-year-migraine dealing with his crazy family member who plays god with the Cemetery, in Eden Valley – when she copped an attitude, told me to dig Bob’s cremains up and move them to make her happy, that was it: I closed that Chapter permanently. And I haven’t been back to Eden Valley, since. I don’t make place in my life for tyrants.

My “Chapter Closed” Post: https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2022/08/chapter-closed.html

In this New Chapter of My Life … if I could find 3 friends to go on a State-hopping trip with me across Country – from Coast to Coast, I'd do it in a heartbeat!

I’d like to do it for the scenery, as well as to prove to myself I’m brave enough 😉

Me and my brave cousin Linda, who had ridden across Country in the mid-1980’s, and stopped to say 'Hi' on her way to California (I'm on the backend).

And if the demonrats don't totally destroy the economy between here and then; I plan on doing a little closer-to-home-State-hopping Solo Lobo, in the New Year: the car is still running – and so am I 😊

But, today, the rash seems to be healing – not so itchy, and kinda popping and drying out. Weird … but I am thankful; I want it g.o.n.e. Especially from my face.

Rash appears to be healing ... it's crusting over.

Now, to kick back and enjoy a peaceful, quiet Shabbat Eve.

FLYING SNAKES

‘Silver Bells’

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0HB0dhSyHA)

Before I left the house for my lunch date in town, I texted my granddaughter and her husband a Happy Anniversary message: their second.

Downtown parking was hard to find, but we both managed to find a spare space and zipped into it after several passes around the block 😉

‘Remember/Christmas’ song: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TisqJTlSQgs)

We enjoyed a nice, relaxed 2-hour lunch, in which several topics were touched on … but mostly we talked about our lives in the moment. My friend wants to retire – but it doesn’t look like that will happen any time soon. Children were discussed, and Grandchildren were bragged about, and ooohed and awwwed over; and when I was asked if Alyna stays in touch with me (my friend remembers Alyna from 4 years to graduation time: my friend only knows about my grandson in conversation) … I said, “not much: we text on occasion, but that’s about it. And I don’t know anything about Azariah, at all – nothing is shared when I ask. I miss them – but, they have to miss me too. And want to spend time with me: right now, that is not happening. Bob's death changed everything.”

This is confusing to my friend because my friend knew how close Alyna and I were: and knows how excited I was about Azariah coming into our lives so unexpectantly. My friend knows, that next to Bob, my grandkids are the stars in my life.

It is confusing to me also; but this is how my life has turned out. I don’t like that – but, I’ve made peace with what is.

So, our thoughts and convo gravitated towards more in the moment topics: my summer daytrip adventures, my planned 2022 road trips out-of-State, covid madness, and the recent tornado that struck the USA. These are ‘safe topics’ that don’t squelch the Holiday Spirit.

As soon as Chinook Pass opens up for safe travel … I’ll be locking the house and heading into the great wide open 😉

My friend said, “that will probably be around the time rattlesnakes are out of hibernation and active – and some don’t have rattles.” I figured the time right, but ...

Rattlesnakes without a tail rattle? That, was news to me!

I knew that rattlesnakes go underground, and slip into a hibernating type of Winter mode: and I know that they slither back above ground in the Spring when the weather warms up … and are a serious concern in the Summer months; and I always assumed their tails were rattle activated.

I’m still interested in gravitating towards ‘The Center Of The Universe’; it intrigues me. I hope I do not bring a hitch-hiking creepy crawler back home with me.

It will be a long trip, but worthwhile.

The obamanites are already screaming 'climate change!' when speaking about the recent Kansas tornado cluster.

Flying snakes entered the convo ... there are a LOT of venomous snakes in the Midwest region: it’s a concerning thought!

Rattle-less Rattlesnakes: https://rattlesnakesolutions.com/snakeblog/science-and-education/are-rattlesnakes-evolving-to-rattle-less-or-losing-their-rattles/

Rattlesnake facts: https://www.livescience.com/43683-rattlesnake.html

There is actually a snake that does fly … but it lives in Asia.

Snakes in Your Car: https://altdriver.com/country/snake-got-in-car/

Flying snakes (especially venomous snakes) was not anything I had even considered when thinking about hurricanes and tornadoes. But obviously my friend thinks about it: I’d rather those things had not been said!

I hope I do not have nightmares tonight ☹

Obviously, we were overthinking.

When my friend went back to the job site, I left downtown behind and drove home via Olympia Way – and smiled when I caught sight of Nutty Narrows Bridge: Bob always glanced at the little squirrel bridge suspended between trees flanking the street - he was the first to point it out to me, shortly after we were married in 1974; and it has become habit to me too, to glance at it in passing, over the years.

The Nutty Narrows Bridge has the titles of “World’s Narrowest Bridge”, and “World’s Narrowest Animal Crossing”: it is decorated for seasonal holidays 😉

I also noticed a chain link fence surrounding the Campus Towers Sign; with torn up ground … and no tall building. That made me sad because Bob’s grandmother has lived there after she became a widow in the 1981. I could not find any information about demolition concerning the building – but the fence is present, the ground looks like a construction site, and that tall building was not seen.

Christmas Tree & Electricized Snowflakes on Nutty Narrows Bridge; Olympia Way & 18th Avenue junction.

Nutty Narrows Bridge – the Campus Towers Building, also in the pic, may have been demolished.

The iconic 'Nutty' the Squirrel – Longview's lovable Mascot, wearing a santa hat.

I came home and got comfy: pj’s on … and Christmas lights lit 😊

And received an incoming text: lunch with my friend is now a scheduled ‘thing’ 😉

‘Wish You The Merriest’

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BthDnxNd7Zk)

RAINY DAY ASPIRATIONS

I visited with friends this afternoon.

When I pulled out of the carport, a misty rain was falling; I got a latte at Mr. Bill’s ... and was asked for some more coffee mug cuffs. There are only three left of the nine I had dropped off on the 9^th 😊

I had an enjoyable visit … and came home motivated: conversation had mainly been about adapting to newer life experiences.

I thought on that conversation all the way home; and by the time I had backed the Horizon neatly in place under my home carport, my mind was made up 😉

I have been procrastinating.

But, this afternoon, knowing a serious rain front was moving in … I knew today was the day to “get ‘er done!”

My Fall planting bulbs needed to be planted; which meant the planter pots needed drainage holes drilled into their undersides. The time was perfect to aspire to the task at hand.

I had bought the necessary tools weeks ago.

Last time David and I had breakfast together, he encouraged me to “just do it, Val” – and he was patient answering my clueless questions: even though he laughed occassionally. He is a true friend.

Hole Cutting Drill Bit; bought 15 days ago; I bought an electric hand drill, and a stud finder, about a month ago – to hang a mirror that is still tucked away, waiting to be hung 😉

I have been procrastinating.

It takes me a while to work up the nerve to try new things: I want to “get it right” the first time. So, I will research it to death, and ask my friends a lot of questions (and seek their input), before I actually get around to getting it done. Things take time with me.

Every time I looked at my hand drill, I would remember watching Bob using his heavy drills; and making it look so easy. But, when those memories tried to sabotage my nerve this afternoon, I countered back by reminding those memories that Bob did not exit his mother’s womb with a drill in hand … he had to learn the skill of using one.

Today, it was my turn to learn.

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rOpQjD-rX0g)

I can do this ...

I DID IT!

Giddy with success, I cut holes in the other six pots: transferred them to the carport patio, and got my bulbs planted 😊

The rains expected into next Friday, will water the planters well; and establish them for Spring blossoms.

5 square pots of staggered heights tulips - mixed variety, tete a tete daffodils, and puschkinia.

2 rectangular planters of Tete a tete miniature daffodils, & anemone.

The planters are being watered right now, by a soft, steady rainfall; the promising Spring color will be a welcome contrast against the ugly neighboring fenceline.

Now, I’m going to kick back in the recliner, and enjoy the warmth of the flickering fireplace.

And crochet/embellish another batch of coffee mug cuffs 😉

Fired up the fireplace this evening.

Working on more coffee mugs cuffs.

DISTRACTIONS

I still have a sore throat from that chihuahua dog that was a Bingo a week ago (I am seriously allergic to dogs); so last night I took a small swallow of Nyquil … and woke up at 10:30 this morning.

After dressing, making the bed, and washing my hair; I thought I’d drive to Vader for lunch. I like the Little Crane Café, and this morning seemed like a good time to revisit: gotta satisfy my gypsy bone as best I can 😉

It would be a short hop: about half an hour … but I’d be out of the house, and out of Longview for a bit.

Little Crane Cafe from Heron Pointe; via Delameter Road & Westside Highway - 35 minutes.

Junction of Delameter Road & Westside Highway.

I figured I’d have my big meal in Vader – and eat a salad later tonight.

I’ve shed 4 pounds this week eating calorie counting meals, and walking on my treadmill twice a day 😊

Passing through Lexington, I saw that the construction there is moving along at a quick pace.

Lexington is up-and-coming. 

Quickly.

A lot of new building has begun dotting the land since we had lived there from 2013 –2017.

In 4 short years, Lexington is practically unrecognizable.

Construction in Lexington – on Westside Highway, near Aaron Drive, is picking up in pace ...

Construction site sits in the large area; streetside of Ventura Dr., and Ponderosa Drive.

When I arrived in Vader, I noticed detour signs.

As I neared the café … I noticed that the road was seriously blocked: and detour signs were several blocks from the rail line.

Well – shoot!

I really did not want to turn back to Longview … I wanted to eat lunch in Vader ☹

So, I thought I’d give the Winlock access a try: maybe I could get to the Little Crane Café through the back door (so to speak) 😉

I backtracked to S Military Road.

S Military Road from Vader; 6 minutes.

Winlock from S Military Road; via Nikula Road; 9 minutes.

It should have been a simple thing. 

I have driven these roads many times.

But there were detour signs and road blocks, placed haphazardly, everywhere.

I followed the orange arrows.

I kept wondering where the heck the signs were leading – I was on roads that were not familiar to me.

Miles and miles later, when I stopped at a stop sign at a four-way junction, a memory came to mind and I recognized the locality … Bob had driven this route on our Yelm meat run 4 years ago (we bought from a butcher, there): I had not been on this forgotten road route since Bob drove it, in the Fall of 2017. I realized I was on the way to Centralia!

Centralia is nowhere near Winlock.

Centralia is seriously out of the way from where I needed to be.

WHY were the detour arrows leading people waaaaay out of the way?

So, making sure there was no traffic coming at me from any direction – I made a U-turn, and backtracked … looking for familiar landmarks.

Another Learning Experience ...

I'm going to be thankful for every Learning Experience this year.

On a hunch, I turned onto a road going in the general direction of Winlock – and had an (((aha!))) moment, when I saw a brown wooden road sign pointing to Winlock’s Winolequa Park. I was happy to see that sign, for two reasons: it was familiar, and I needed to make a quick pit stop at the Park’s Restroom 😉

Backtracking; turned at the roadside brown Park Arrow. FAMILIAR TERRIRORY!

I was pleasantly surprised to see that the Park had undergone a serious overhaul … but I also was wondering, “Where are small towns getting all this serious $$$$$ for major overhauls?” These are dead-end, back-county towns – with little to no job opportunities: where are the funds coming from????

The Park did not look anything like this cleaned-up version, when I was last here with Bob in 2018.

I’m more than a little afraid to let my thoughts wander down the path that is being highlighted – and played out in DC’s communist/socialist House chambers; and big cities across America.

I didn’t want to contemplate too deeply, the poisonous tentacles that are forcing their way into every aspect of American life.

I did not want to give place to anger today. 

I wanted to pee … and be on my way.

Happy to see the sign 😊

WOW. Fancier than the restrooms available in 2017!

All that was here before, was a shanty style restroom, the playground, and the old gray table ... there was no picnicking covered area.

There's a 'Park Host' now, parking is no longer a mud fest affair - and the game fields have been upgraded, too.

MAP Rhoades Rd, Winlock.

Coming into Winlock from Rhoades Road.

I made tracks for Vader.

I was hungry; all I’d put into my stomach since last night, was a mug of coffee … 1½ hours ago.

Thankfully, the backroad into Vader from Winlock was not in shutdown mode: I was able to access the café 😉

Little Crane Cafe - 7th Street, Vader.

The road was seriously closed; no one would be trying to sneak through.

A half hour hop had morphed into a 1½-hour ordeal.

1½ hours since I started from home.

My stomach was growling to be fed; it was not happy with the delay.

I saw my table as soon as I entered – a small table: perfect for a solo lobo.

I could have done without the witchy pumpkin ... but I was in no position to be choosy.

Liver & Onions; I needed the fortification after all the detour stress – 885 calories: staying on target 😉

Relaxed, and fat and sassy; I paid my lunch tab, and headed home – backtracking through Winlock.

Railroad contractors that had no local sense of the region they are directing detour routes.

I was thankful for the memory that kicked in and prodded me to turn back and find my way to my destination. I am thankful those memories helped me stay calm in a distracting situation. I am thankful that those memories are a part of me.

I was thankful for Bob's 101 ways to get to 1 place! Jarring those memories has saved my bacon more than once. LOL

But I will be 100-percent on my own, when I go out of State ...

Gypsy Soul Ambitions.

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8T79QmeSEcs)

Nearing Castle Rock, the car dash pinged … and glancing at it, I saw a notification that needed addressed – I use windshield washer fluid a lot. I decided to nip over to Dick Hannah’s in Kelso and see if I could get it refilled before the maintenance shop closed.

Another distracting detour ...

So, I cut over to N Pacific Highway, and merged with S Kelso Drive: this route is a nice country drive 😊

The shop crew was accommodating, and a gallon of washer fluid was replaced. I was thankful.

I topped the gas tank off in town … and drove the backroad, Pacific Way Highway, home.

Pacific Way Road, Longview.

And was not happy to see that that abandoned trailer had been torched.

Apparently, vandalism has been notched up, to a more violent action.

A shameful eyesore.

WHY is the city not removing this eyesore?

WHY has this abandoned trailer, and car, been allowed to remain in this spot for a least a month; probably longer?

Any other car or trailer in any other locality, would have been promptly impounded and hauled away by a tow truck on the city’s payroll.

The city should have removed them a month ago. It's clear/obvious vandalism abandonment.

The “city officials” here are worthless.

Is it any wonder than I escape Longview as often – and as long – as I can?