SUNDAY~FUNDAY #11 – Kalama Waterfront Walk

Lodge & Totems

I drove to Kalama this morning to do the waterfront walk there – I had been told this past Winter that it was a nice park, and Bob and I knew a Lodge had gone up though we never checked it out. So, I was curious as to what the Park looked liked now – the lodge can be seen from the freeway, but the Park grounds have to be directly driven to … to be viewed.

Before I left the carport at home, I punched in the address of McMenamin’s Harbor Lodge to keep me on the right track – I kinda/sorta knew where it was located, but I am finding after Bob’s spirit left me, that my memory isn’t what it used to be. I think that when I am going places where I went often with Bob, my brain kinda shuts down and directional memory lapses – this may be a protection mode to keep my emotions under check when my heart is saying, ‘Bob is not here – Bob is not here – Bob is not here’ when I see the passenger seat empty … but places I know by heart, I now need to punch into the GPS navigator because my mind just goes blank when I am trying to remember how to get there – I can see the place in my mind’s eye, but I am at a complete loss as to how to get there. And these places I’ve gone to for 44 years with my husband! I even drove to many of them.

But I am learning that thought processing dramatically changes when widowhood becomes a part of life – E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. is thrown off kilter.

This affliction is something a widow learns to live with - and she understands that very few people will understand ... or be patient with her when it strikes.

And as outgoing and personable as I appear to be to some people – I’m not, really. I’m pretty shy, and standoffish - actually; until I feel comfortable around people. I put myself out there when I have to (like when I need help, or need to socialize to have some semblance of a life), but I’m generally uncomfortable doing that without Bob by my side. I actually suffer a lot of nervous anxiety going places/meeting strangers, alone. What people see as confidence in me, is really false bravado born out of necessity: it gets me through the moment, and it bolsters my confidence as I am trying to rebuild my life solo lobo – but sometimes I feel so out of my depth, that I’m blanking out while people are talking to me, and fighting uneasiness while engaging in activities. Being part of a couple from teen years to senior years, with Bob, was my confidence: being a graying solo lobo undermines that confidence.

I saw encouragement in this heart-shaped tree top, across the street at home as I went online to find the Lodge’s address as a main landmark to my destination. I felt I would be overshadowed by love in my adventure ;-)

Important memo to self – I was thinking this while heading out of town …

I don’t mind admitting that the PTS blankness when it comes to places I want to revisit, is wigging me out somewhat. I am hoping – and I expect it will back off significantly the more comfortable I get with doing these solo lobo ventures without Bob. But I hate the weirdness of it.

While I am thankful for the GPS feature of the car … the GPS directions were a little confusing when I reached Kalama turnoff, and I ended up down by the log export shipping area … and I knew that wasn’t right; that was not where I needed to be – to get where I wanted to be: I’d only been here a few times with Bob years ago; but I knew we had not driven past the export yard. So, I did a U-turn in the first available place and backtracked and finally found the right turn relying on spotty memory ;-)

The speed bumps there are as huge as the speed bumps in Heron Pointe, so they have to be driven over very carefully at about 5 mph. Seriously - they will damage the undercarriage of the car at higher speeds.

I finally reached my planned destination :-D

WOWSERS!

I was not prepared to be dazzled ... NOTHING was familiar, and everything screamed yuppie bling: the landscape had been totally reshaped and restructured. The last time I’d been there, it was just rolling grass fields with totem poles (carved by Chief Lelooska: https://portofkalama.com/port-of-kalama-commissioners-move-to-accept-donation-of-totem-poles-from-wineberg-family/) standing tall and proud at one end of the Park grounds. The Park that greeted my eyes this morning is a sort of yuppified version of big city culture.

The Lodge is H.U.G.E. with a backside veranda that runs the full length of the building, and looks out over the Columbia River. I’m not sure if the usage of that veranda is for Lodge guests only (I know the coffee shop and gift shop is open to the public), but if it’s free space for everyone I may sit out there some fine day and pretend I am a paying guest ;-)

The Park has certainly evolved.

Amphitheater

Looking downriver - towards Portland way ...

Bob, if he were still here, couldn’t have come anyway.

Park Grounds Patrol

Next time I’ll wear my windbreaker; it got HOT quick, even with the river wind. The humidity was pretty high and halfway into the walk my hair was stringy and limp … by the time the walk ended, I was soaked from head to toe; my clothes were stuck to me like I’d gone swimming in them, and my hair looked like I’d swam through an oil slick.

The people I met were very friendly, talkative, and personable: even the kids were well mannered and friendly.

The beach cabin at the upper end of the Park is basically a beach bar with a limited menu of sandwiches, pizzas, beers & wines.

If I want to add extra mileage to my next walk at this Park, to make it a legit hike (3 miles is a legit hike), I will have to walk the pavement on the backside of the beach cabin – there really isn’t anything there but a narrow parking area where fishermen park their vehicles, but it will add more time and mileage:

Fishermen at upper end of Park.

Ahles Point Cabin

I saw a lot of aging, material-minded 'hippies'.

Port of Kalama

And even with the train traffic (the Park is right next to the train tracks), and freeway traffic that could clearly be heard – it wasn’t noisy at all. The time spent there was very pleasant. I’m going to be going back, for sure …

HOT! Next time I'll wear my windbreaker.

Restrooms set up with showers for the marina moorage patrons.

Not an official hike - didn't make the 3 mile mark.

Lucky Dragon front entrance.

Orders taken at the door for pickup and takeout only - no inside seating; just order placement ... then booted out to go sit in the car for 15 minutes.

Order Counter is literally at the door - barely room to stand and place order; counter is THAT close to the door.

I'll try this place next time I come through here. Never went here with Bob, so it will be a true solo lobo experience ...

When I reached Longview, I drove down Industrial Way, home. Waiting for the light to turn at the 4-way-junction by the bridge crossing over into Rainier, OR, there as a very strong odor of skunk by Starbucks (could have been the coffee shop itself since they support skunky ‘causes’) – not sure if the spray was on another car’s tires … or if a skunk had been run over in that area somewhere (when Bob as driving Lemmons trunks on Industrial Way, he said there are deer & coyotes on Industrial Way; so there may also be skunks); but the odor was nauseating. I was thankful when the light finally changed and traffic started moving again.

Trudy had texted me while I was walking the last leg of the waterfront in Kalama, asking me to meet her at the back fence when I got back home – so as soon as I parked, I gave her a jingle and let her know I was home and would be at the fence in a few minutes. When I got there, she handed me a loaf of the Friendship Bread she had just finished baking – it smelled delicious!

And it was ;-)

Amish Friendship Bread

(https://www.friendshipbreadkitchen.com/recipe-amish-friendship-bread/)

Trudy gave me when I got home – I ate a slice with my Chinese lunch ...

Pork fried Rice-Chicken Chow Mien-Almond Chicken

Before coming in the house, I checked the Dragon radishes I had planted, as I saw one of them was ready to harvest; so, I did. I'll try it sliced into a radish sandwich tomorrow and see what it tastes like:

1 of the DRAGON RADISHES I planted this year - it looks a little obscene. LOL.

It takes about 14 minutes to get to Kalama, driving straight down the freeway if traffic moves smoothly. It takes roughly 6 minutes to make Carrolls on the backroad (the old highway) – and about 10 more minutes to reach home via Industrial Way on the backside of Heron Pointe.

So, my drive didn’t eat a large chunk out of my day, and I had an enjoyable 2 hour walk at the Kalama Waterfront Park; and a relaxing drive home :-D

I’m giving this Sunday~Funday a success rating ;-)

**SUNDAY~FUNDAY POSTS (2020) –

#10 - https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2020/05/sundayfunday-10.html

#9 – https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2020_04_27_archive.html (plus 1st thru 8th SUNDAY~FUNDAY links)**

RADISHES, NECK WARMERS, AND MISSING MY SOMEONE

This morning I got a call from my back fence neighbor, Trudy, asking me if I could meet her at the fence – I laughed and said I could. When I walked outside, she had a bag of freshly picked radishes for me … she planted an abundance of them and her little garden box is pumping out more than she and Ed can eat ;-)

I like radishes, but I knew the ones I carried into the house would go bad before I could eat them, so I decided to freeze them and use them throughout the months ahead :-D

Sliced radish greens; for soup greens.

Shredded radish bulbs.

I’ve never frozen radishes before, but I didn’t see why they couldn’t be frozen … so, I did. Of course, frozen radishes can only be used in recipes where their altered texture – due to freezing – won’t take away from the taste aspect. Most people familiar with radishes only use them sliced into salads, or as appetizer tidbits. But there are other tasty ways, too, to enjoy radishes in your diet:

*Add thin slices to your sandwiches.

*Add a few grated radishes to coleslaw.

*Add a peppy kick to your tuna or chicken salad sandwich by adding 1 to 2 teaspoons of chopped or shredded radishes to your sandwich.

*Make a radish dip by blending ½ cup yogurt, ¼ cup chopped radishes, 1 minced garlic, and a splash of red wine vinegar until smooth.

The health benefits of radishes are pretty awesome :-D Just ½ cup of radishes will give you roughly 14% of your recommended daily allowance of Vitamin C. Vitamin C is an antioxidant that helps battle heart disease, some cancers, and other bodily diseases. Vitamin C also helps prevent cell damage caused by aging, unhealthy lifestyle choices, and environmental toxins. Vitamin C also plays a key role in collagen production – which supports healthy skin and blood vessels.

Radishes are also a natural antifungal, and are a friend to women! Radishes contain an antifungal protein that aides in killing and clearing up vaginal yeast infections, and oral yeast infection (aka: thrush).

Radish greens are rich in Vitamins A, B6, C; Magnesium, Phosphorus, Iron, Calcium, Potassium, Fiber, and Folic Acid.

Radishes are almost a powerful addition to you diet as zucchini is!

As I was bagging them up and putting them in the freezer, Trudy sent me a text inviting me to go hiking with her, Ed, and Bill on Wednesday. I’ll go, of course – it is enjoyable; Ed is 78, Trudy is 76, and Bill’s age is somewhere between them and me; I’m ‘the baby’ at 63. LOL

This will not be an official hike though because WA State has not yet reached Stage 3; but we are going to go hiking anyway. The way things are going in this state with durkin and inslee at the helm, we may NEVER reach Stage 3; they are drunk with power and enjoying the nazi tactics on both the covid-19 front, and the chaz uprising in seattle.

Speaking of the political nonsense that is tearing American apart at the seams … it’s times like this I really miss my someone’s actual physical presence.

Over the course of the past 17 months (18 months tomorrow), I have made peace with widowhood, being a solitary solo lobo, and an occasional third wheel. I am learning to do things without calling Kerry down off his mountain homestead to help me. I am learning to step outside my comfort level, and ask for help and advice from strangers, when the occasion arises. I am learning to go and explore new places on my own and enjoy them; alone, and on my own – places Bob and I had never been to together. I am learning to accept invites to join group activities; without bulking and shying away because Bob won’t be going with me. I am learning to accept invites for Supper at friends’ homes … or just hang out with them for the day, and not be bummed because they have spouses and family present – and I don’t.

There is just me getting the phone calls, the phone texts, and the invites.

Just me.

And I’ve learned to be okay with that.

This is my life now.

Just me.

I know I had a great someone; and I know I had a love – and a love story – that most can only dream of. I was blessed to have lived that life with Bob. I am blessed that Elohim has been merciful and faithful to keep me sane and held up with His grace these past 17 months.

But then, something will trigger that emotional storm and breathing becomes difficult again.

I’m tired of grieving for America - 60 years is enough.

I’m tired of being caught up in emotional whirlwinds: Bob’s spirit’s exit from this Earth, the kids’ abandonments, the covid-19 hysteria and never-ending grief pall continually stirred up political agendas and media talking heads; watching our great Nation being torn apart by political madness, and losing people I considered friends because they are caught up in the insanity of the moment of too many global grieving moments.

I am tired of the politically motivated grieving cycle.

I want to laugh.

I want to be happily active.

I want to feel something besides politically motivated angst.

I want to feel Bob reaching out his hand to take my hand and give it a reassuring squeeze.

I want to feel Bob wrap his long arms around me and kiss the top of my head.

I want to feel Bob loving me and telling me everything will be okay while I lay across his big manly chest and play with his chest hairs.

In these days of back-to-back national turmoil that is morphing into a never-ending-grieving cycle … I miss the comforting embrace, kisses, loving, of my special someone.

Instead it is just me to comfort me.

Sometimes I dink around in my garden area.

Sometimes I go for walks; and long drives.

Sometimes I busy myself with crafting; I finished 2 knitted homespun neck warmers for Fall hikes:

2 Seed St neck warmers.

I somehow broke my plastic 10½ knitting needle; darn it.

Sometimes I listen to music.

Sometimes, I lash out in anger at grief laden situations and annoy the hell out of everyone – including myself: I’ve done that quite a bit this week. I am sick and tired of hearing about covid-19 and riotous mayhem … and of no one ballsy enough to step forward and stop the insanity.

Sometimes, I just stare out the window for a bit – looking up at the clouds in the sky; missing my husband.

Trying to find light at the end of the tunnel.

And sometimes, I just lay in bed before sleep claims me … remembering his smell, his touch, his eyes, and his smile: sometimes I cry a little – sometimes I don’t.

I always miss my someone. But in days of turmoil and unrest, I really miss his comforting presence.