Today I left the sanctuary of our home and ventured
into the fellowship of a small group of people Bob and I used to spend time with;
seniors like ourselves, and Christians – also like us. “Keenagers” meets every
Tuesday for an hour of companionship (chit
chat; gotta keep those vocal cords limber), potluck (a must as some seniors may not be eating healthy meals due to
financial strains), missionary updates (always
good to hear about ministerial updates from around the globe), a short
sermonette, and singing of a few selected hymns (worship is a part if every Christian gathering … at least it should be:
and is here). I asked Bob’s oldest sister to go with me today because she
is struggling with his passing and I thought it would be good for her to get
out and mingle too. She went … and plans to go some more :-D She kept telling
everyone, “She is a rock (meaning me)” – I don’t feel like a rock, but I
KNOW THE ROCK (Psalm 18:1-2), and THAT is what sustains me.
I went today because I am tired of sitting around
and I wanted to get out of the house and find out if I could mingle with people
on my own without Bob by my side – he was the people person, not me: I was more
than content to stay in the background when we went places, but now I HAVE to
get out ‘on my own’ and I needed to find out if I could without breaking down …
I could, and I did even though I did have 1 weepy moment while singing the
song, “Ivory Palaces” when ‘eternal home’ was sung.
Also, I wanted to let our friends know that Bob
was now setting up home in our celestial home. Several people got emotional –
they loved Bob; and they were concerned for me. But, I comforted them by saying
that I am rejoicing that Bob is with our Lord now, and is no longer in any more
pain. I also said that since he had died a second death in 1981 (the first was
1978 when a blood clot broke loose and caused havoc), we had lived with impending
death for a long time and understood that we were enjoying borrowed time: we kinda
knew that we would not get a 3rd reprieve if and when his ticket was
called again and that is why while asking
for a healing we also asked for a speedy and dignified death if that was what
was to be; we always let Elohei be God and we always bowed to His Will. No
matter the outcome. I stressed that we were okay with that because in 1981 he
had been granted, by the grace of Elohim, an additional 37 years of life we wouldn’t
have had, had Elohei not been faithful and favored us with compassionate mercy.
I believe that Elohim granted those 37 years because we were so in love and so much a PART OF each other; we were together constantly except when he
was working. Aside from living for Elohim, we lived for each other; and
everyone who knew us knew that about us – including our children, and sometimes
that caused friction between them and us. Those years graced to us allowed us
to raise our 2 children to adulthood and to be gifted 4 grandchildren born into
our small family. We were thankful. And we knew where he would be going when he
went: some people don’t know that and their sorrow is devastating. Not so with
us; we sorrowed, then we regrouped and rejoiced! And in doing so, I am
strengthened; and can comfort those who struggle with coming to grips with Bob’s
passing from this life to the next.
The Scripture passage today was Philippians 3:12 thru v.15. It was a
timely message. Since 1981, Bob “pressed on toward the goal to win the prize”
and he obtained it December 14th when he answered Heaven’s call to ‘Bob! Come home good and faithful son!’
And “all of us who are mature should embrace this point of view”. Amen. Like I
said … it was a timely and potent message.
These are the hymns we sang today – I only knew ‘The
Solid Rock’ … the others I had not heard until this afternoon. But I like ‘em
;-)
