A CHAT WITH A STRANGER ~ WILLOW GROVE HIKE

This morning while I was enjoying my morning cup of joy juice, I got a text from Trudy & Ed, asking if I wanted to go hiking out at Willow Grove Park – I said, “Yes!” So, they picked me up around 9 AM and off we went. As I was buckling the seat belt, Trudy said, “Bruce will be meeting us there.”

Bruce is the Hiking Club President.

A stranger – Trudy has spoken of him often, but I’ve not met him.

I was nervous. I knew I wasn’t being ‘set up’ because I’ve been pretty upfront with everyone – including Trudy – that I’m not interested in dating. I’m still a married woman. I am still in love with my husband, who now resides in Heaven for the past 17 months/20 days/55 minutes.

But, we were having an actual “Hike day”, and Bruce is the Head Honcho. It’s important that I meet him and be comfortable in his company. I don’t know what I expected, but Bruce wasn’t that. He was laid back, easy to be around, and a fun personality.

When we arrived and parked, we all introduced ourselves and it was comfortable. I felt as though we’d all been friends all of our lives – it was that laid back.

Instead of walking the laid-out gravel trails right off, we decided instead to add mileage to the hike by including a mile of river beach hiking. So, we went off Park property and skirted the edges of private lots to walk along the river. It was a nice leisurely hike; and we all appreciated the beauty that surrounded us in everything and everyone along the hike:

Private property boundary. Beach is open t the public.

Osprey nest. Female in the nest.

 

Osprey mate with something in its mouth.

Osprey nest, with a snowman in the background and planked beach walk on the right.

The best time to walk on the river beach is after the tide has gone out and hardened it up.

Wild roses.

Fancy, expensive houses in the background. Willow Grove was a farming community at one time - now it is a playground for the wealthy.

Ed & Bruce getting ahead of us gals.

We gals were lagging behind because we were stopping to take pictures; and chat with a few fishermen, and some of the private land owners – everyone was friendly and talkative. A chat with a stranger can bring interest to the day ;-)

The markings on this short log reminded me of a sand dollar.

 A ship anchored and waiting to be allowed into the Longview Port & Ship Yard down river.

End of our hike this way; Trudy, Ed & Bruce. 1 MILE. We would have walked further if that tree hadn't blocked the way ...

The guys were teasing each other for having shaggy hair because everything had been shuttered for months, and Trudy said she and Ed have hair appointments next Monday – masks required. I said that yesterday I noticed hair salons downtown saying they are open, but the phone numbers they have posted on their doors to make appointments by, “cannot be completed at this time” … and there is NO furniture in the salons except the barber chairs. If you dare go into a salon unmasked, you are screeched at for not wearing a mask: which tells me they are not truly opened for business.

And those salons that have screeching chimps for “professional hair cutters” have lost my future business.

I have asthma – people who suffer asthma already feel like they are wearing a plastic bag over their faces: demanding they wear a mask that further restricts their breathing and makes them feel suffocated is demeaning, ridiculous, and shameful. I refuse to wear a mask. For any reason.

Most businesses downtown leave wearing a mask optional – those places that allow freedoms and choices, get my business and $$$.

I don’t mind looking shaggy to stand up for my dignity and American Citizen Rights. Eventually common sense will reign again, and then I’ll have my hair attended to by salons willing to take my $$ without making me feel claustrophobic or like a criminal.

The guys were a hoot today, with their ribbings on each other and their general clowning around :-D

Me & the guys. Bruce trying to balance on the log – everyone ‘distancing’.

I’ve always had male friends, and I like male companionship – I like the different energy males give out, and their weird sense of humor.

As I mentioned earlier, Bruce was easy to be around; and pretty soon we were talking, joking, and laughing like we’d known each other forever. It was comfortable. It was good. I’m not looking to replace Bob; no one can ever take his place in my life. I’m not shopping for a friend with benefits; and I’m not in the market for another husband. As far as I’m concerned, there isn’t a man alive that will ever fill Bob’s shoes. But companionship – someone to talk with/walk with/someone to share time with/and get a male perspective from, is welcome. I’ve been missing that in my life. Days like today are okay for this married-married widow.

Bruce has been living a bachelor life since 2004; he was widowed in his mid-40’s – his wife had a sudden heart attack and didn’t survive. He said he was in shock, and dated off and on over the years, but that doesn’t go anywhere because he is sorta expecting those other women to be like his wife; and of course, they aren’t and can’t be.

And I said that is exactly why I could never date anyone … it would end disastrously and be unfair all the way around: I love Bob. His body died, but love lives on. I can’t imagine myself doing anything I did with Bob, with anyone else. A.N.Y.T.H.I.N.G.: I just couldn’t. Bob loved me so thoroughly and so satisfactorily, he spoiled me for anyone else.

Bruce said he is coming to the same conclusion in his own life situations.

Widowing people understand each other; we can discuss things with each other that we can’t discuss with our children, relatives, or close friends who are still couples. We can discuss things – dicey things – with each other without feeling weird about the discussions.

A chat with a stranger can bring interest to a day.

Me: “Plus es ten vous” (there is more within you). Amen!

 

Ocean Beach Highway & Stella in the distance. This is the road I drive to get to Eden Valley.

Big tracks of a big bird: probably a Great Blue Heron

A lone little crab claw. We were surprised ... Willow Grove is a loooong way from the Pacific Ocean. I’m pretty sure there are no crabs this far down the Columbia River. It's a mystery.

A waterlogged and uprooted tree against the wooden piles wave break.

I have gal pals that I used to meet on a regular basis before inslee put on his nazi uniform, ad put a halt to face-to-face meets. I have monthly phone convos with 1; and have been enjoying Sunday Suppers with 1 … but neither are into hiking. So, this Hiking Club has been a true blessing to me.

After we left the river beach, we finished the hike by walking the laid-our gravel hiking trails …

A brown wild rabbit hiding in the grass (in front of left boulder). Willow Grove highway is just past those boulders.

Something new on the river since we walked this way half an hour ago ...

Fella on top of the boat shed started waving at everyone watching the progression.

Today was a good day; we charted a 3 mile hike, chatted with strangers, and solidified budding friendships :-D

And I was invited to the local Bears Baseball Games when they start playing - I love baseball games! Baseball games was not something Bob or the kids got into; but I enjoy the sport, so I am glad to be included in the outings.

When I got back home, I looked up Camelback Backpack w-Water Bladder to wear during longer hikes. It will be spendy, but worth it. I’m aiming to have one in my possession by August – hopefully the State will be more open by then, and life will start picking up again ;-)

PRESIDENT TRUMP THREATENS TO DEPLOY MILITARY TO STATES IF CARNAGE CONTINUES

I’m in favor of this … violence is not “peaceful protest”.

barak hussain obama befriended terrorists and applauded antifa.

Donald J. Trump denounces terrorists and will imprison them.

It is good to have a MAN in the Oval Office; who loves America and Americans.

DEVELOPMENTS

Before I went out Coal Creek this afternoon (https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2020/05/if-that-is-key-component.html), I finished threading the hood drawstring through the last of the Baby Sweater Jackets I’ve been knitting up:

White jacket & jackets lineup. 6 MO (https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2020/04/pocketed-baby-sweater-jacket-pattern-6.html)

I had an enjoyable time for 4 hours; good friends are a treasure ;-)

When I got home, I received a text from Bob’s youngest sister showing how she has had the bird feeder Bob built for her (that is a duplicate of the 1^st one he made, for me) refurbished, and perching on a ringed pergola that she can plant a climbing rose at the base of …

Rosie’s refurbished bird feeder, that is now a sided bird house. This Cross Design is Bob’s own design.

Bob would be pleased, I’m sure :-D

Meanwhile birds were gathering and enjoying the bird feeder Bob built for me, hanging here, at the last house we will ever have shared together – 2 things that are tangible and visual reflections of the life I shared with Bob a lifetime ago.

Bob liked watching the birds at the feeder; so do I:

Lesser Goldfinch

Turtledove

I always like seeing turtledoves. My Bazaar Business Name & Logo for years was “2 Turtledoves”. Turtledoves represent enduring love and peace of the deepest kind. Seeing a turtledove reminds me of the blessings of Elohim, and my spirit is immediately soothed.

Seeing those weather stained things Bob lovingly built for me had me thinking of safe ways to clean them up that would not harm the birds that frequent them. As soon as the nesting season is over, I am going to clean the feeder and bird house – they need cleaning.

==Bleaching bird feeders: https://www.ecomall.com/greenshopping/birdfeeders3.htm

==Bleaching bird houses: https://www.thespruce.com/clean-bird-houses-the-right-way-386629

Tomorrow while I am in town, I am going to pick up some new pots and move these coleus’ and blooming geranium outside …

These are new plants gained in my new life - they have nothing to do with my life with Bob. It's a small step forward . I bought the coleus's last summer, and started the blooming geranium from slips snipped from mother plants.

IF - THAT is the KEY Component

Today, at noon, I was spending the day with friends; visiting and sharing precious time together … and enjoying Supper together later on.

It was a time of refreshing, away from phone calls and media sources that spew fear and incite violence.

While President Trump and other politicians … as well as the general public keep saying we, as a Nation, are dealing with “an invisible enemy”, I don’t think that is accurate. Yes, we are dealing with an enemy – but it is not invisible, nor unknown. And we know it is seeking to destroy us, because its tool has said so.

                                                 

obama is an angry black homosexual racist, who praised islam and denounced Christianity his entire tyrannical 8 year political coup; obama is the feather in the demoncrats’ hats (they refer to him as their messiah) – and like king Sennacherib of ancient days, he has a glib tongue with which he cajoles the weak-minded and rebellious hearted: including undiscerning career {pastors} who do not know Elohim, but are worldly minded – being people pleasers rather than God-pleasers.

Covid-19 is still present. And, at my age, I am still considered ‘at risk’ But, death does not frighten me; and I am more concerned at the present about the fear this virus has caused to seep into minds, lives, businesses, politics, and churches (that should know better!). It concerns me that the demoncrat party is hourly provoking weak minded people to incite violence – and the face of the tool being manipulated by the enemy continues to flap his bitterly hateful yap; and refuses to understand he is NO LONGER prez: his OPINIONS concerning the current President is opinionated political wrangling of the most shameful sort – his opinions are whipping his minions into a violent frenzy that is doing more damage to this Nation than covid-19 ever could.

Over the past few days, I have seen a replay of the 1991 rodney king fiasco, where demoncrats then whipped the masses into a hateful frenzy that resulted in days of violent rioting/looting/murdering of people who were not black: it was the worst civil disturbance seen in the USA in the 20^th Century. Then, as now, the police did not respond quickly or with discernment – they hid themselves from the destruction happening in their neighborhood, and in their State … recently, President Trump has denounced the police of Minneapolis, that literally RAN from the violence instead of countering it and stopping the 6 days of violent rioting/looting/murder in the streets.

And police wonder why they “get no respect” – cowards are never respected.

What is happening today is not peaceful protests – it is bloody, destructive carnage. It is cowardly racial hatred fueled by politics. Incited by a man who STILL will not let go of his political coup. Applauded by his minions in the demoncrat party that have said they intend to “bring America to its knees”. They FAILED in attempt after attempt to bring this President, and this Nation, down to their level of insanity: they are hopelessly lost in an insane grip of hatred and are using race to fan the flames of their destructive bent.

And I feel sad and have pity for those in my immediate family who actually support this insanity; too stupefied by the rampant hate that they cannot understand that they are championing their own demise – if this Nation goes under, and succumbs to barak hussain obama’s {vision} for America continually foisted on US by a total RACIST and ANTI-American obamanite Congress, they – like those who bought the nazi lies of {protection} will find themselves in the SAME PRISIONS they think to avoid. Mad and rabid dogs eventually turn on each other; and tear each other apart.

I’ve had enough.

I’ve seen too much of this bitter and hateful insanity play out over the decades.

I’ve had an enjoyable 2 days of Shabbat Rest – where the world was shut out and the peace of Elohei was welcomed into my home and my life. I am extending that time of ‘island rest’ through the remainder of this day … and I’m thinking I may go MIA for a bit.

I can’t afford to get caught in the enemy’s snare. I am taking time to pray for myself, for America, for my family, and for all those who have swallowed the demoncrat lies and “know not what they do”.

Time is wrapping up – for me personally, and for the world in general: I need to make sure my heart is right and that I am ready to meet Yeshua when the time comes. I can't be sidelined by the chaos continually whipped up by racists bent on destruction. I don't want to find myself benched in the end game.

It is possible to have peace in the midst of the storm – I have experienced that peace several times in my lifetime when I keep my eyes on Yeshua and my mind on Elohei.

Even though I don’t know where this new path in my life will take me, I am not afraid of the unknown destination … or the continual chaotic frenzies. Elohei has led me through the scariest days of my life over the past 534 days (covid-19 hysterias & murderous rioting is nothing compared to what I have recently endured); and my amazing friends provided things I needed along my journey to support me, and aide me in walking forward with confidence.

My life with Bob’s love in it, opened many exciting doors for 44 years of my 63 years. And my ‘in the moment’ life, now – honoring my husband while restructuring a new life – will open many, many more doors: 1 for each new day I am granted as I walk this Earth solo lobo.

I don’t make time for nonsense.

                               

IF ... THAT is the KEY component to what ails America and Americans. It needs to start with The Church.

IT’S THE LITTLE THINGS

It's the little things that trip us up.

Not everyday ... but some days.

Last year it was finding a lone package of Beef flavored Ramen Noodles that tripped me up. I was 6 months into widowhood, and memories were prodding raw emotions.

This year, it’s the sunburn on my nape, and across the top of my back.

When we were dating … and later, newly married, it was summertime, and Bob was outdoors a lot. He loved to water ski; and play rounds of golf after work – both activities done shirtless: he was beautifully tanned.

That beautiful chestnut tan …

Chestnut brown - by Summer's end, Bob's skin was this dark.

I would ‘tan’ too – but next to Bob’s darkly tanned skin, mine looked almost albino in contrast.

… came at the cost of being beautifully burned. Of course, I didn’t go on these forays with Bob, shirtless, but I did dress as skimpily as legally possible. And neither of us worried about skin cancer. It’s ironic that the one thing we should have worried about, and that doctors and scientists keep harping at us about (skin cancer) left him alone … and an insidious illness, neither one of us knew anything about – or saw coming down the pike, claimed him. I don’t worry about skin cancer for myself now: my philosophy is ‘what will be, will be. You can’t cheat appointed death.’

That said, I’ll get back to the sunburns: Bob’s, the summer of 1974; and mine this summer of 2020. My sunburn today itches like crazy as the skin heals itself; and the skin hurts to touch, so I try not to touch it too much. Bob’s sunburn in 1974 would tear, and I would peel it, so it didn’t look so scruffy. He’d lie across the bed, and I’d straddle his backside and peel the peeling skin off in one large section across his shoulders and down his back to his waist. Then I’d smear his back with cooling Noxema cream. He hated the smell of that stuff, but it soothed.

Bob had a beautiful body. And he had beautiful skin on that beautiful body.

I loved feasting my eyes on his beautifully tanned body.

When I close my eyes, and let my thoughts go back in time … I can clearly see myself standing on the dock at the River Rat tavern, watching him that summer of 1974 – in those short white cutoffs, water skiing the Columbia River behind his cousin’s jet boat with the hot sunshine making the water sparkle and his wet skin gleam while he did those triple ski jumps.

A golden god-like figure of a man.

My man.

And now, as then, I get a lump in my throat – though for entirely different reasons. Now, because Bob is no longer here with me. Then, because he was beauty in action.

I don’t need to be sunburnt to recall that river skiing vision.

But, inadvertently touching my tender sunburnt skin tonight did bring Bob and his sunburn occurrences to mind.

I'm further along in my solo lobo journey, and my emotions aren't so raw anymore.

And for a few minutes while those visions of days long past flitted past my mind's eye, I wished that I had the power to zap us both back to those hot summer days of 1974 when love was blooming and life was easy.

It’s the little things …

BOB'S FIRST LOVE

Bob - 1967. Cathlamet, WA.

This 1968 Camero was Bob's 1st love. He bought it with his own money ... money earned the hard way doing summer jobs and working in the woods with his Dad's log trucking business.

I only saw it once - but I recognized it immediately because Bob talked nonstop about it. He loved it.

It was teal colored and a hot rod ... he outran cops and was untouchable; he wasn't doing anything illegal, just having fun with the local cops. And they were pissed because they could not catch him even though they all KNEW it was him dusting them. He also used his hot rod as a time car for stock car racers at the Tacoma Speedway - racers with a big race coming up would call him to come run his car against theirs because they knew his car was unbeatable and if they could beat his time, they would win the race.

Bob told me, when we bought the Horizon 2½ years ago (shown here), that it was the same color as his Camero was.

His Camero was pretty much all I heard about for the first 3 years of our relationship/marriage.

I listened; you all know how it is with your 1st love. LOL

So anyway, we & Doug (yes, my old boyfriend) were out one afternoon hitting the bars, playing pool and being young when in one bar on Commerce - the one where Country Folks Deli was for 2 decades until they recently moved - the past and the present collided. Before it was a Deli, it was a relic of a bar: nice, but old-timey with a huge woodtop-bar counter that covered one entire wall and boot scraper rail underneath the bar top. A looooong mirror covered the wall behind the bar. It reminded me of an old-time cowboy bar, which it probably was. I needed some fresh air, so I stepped outside to clear my head and have a cigarette. I looked up and saw this guy dinking under the hood of a car that seemed very familiar to me.

Though I had never SEEN Bob's car because he had sold it during his first marriage when Alex came along and money was tight ... I KNEW THIS WAS HIS CAR because he had talked about it so much in glowing detail that I knew that I KNEW this was "THE car". Every instinct lead me forward and I asked the guy what was wrong with the car. He told me, and I got excited for Bob, and said, "I think this is my husband's car - I'll go get him and he can tell you exactly what is wrong and how to fix it."

I went back into the bar and said to Bob, "Babe, there is a guy outside working under the hood of your Camero: why don't you go see if you can help him out a bit."

Bob looked at me quizzically and I explained what I saw and told him again to "Go! Go see your girl one more time." The gleam in Bob's eyes would have made me jealous if I was not secure in his love for me; hahaha

He practically ran out the door. I followed and watched from the sidelines as Bob stuck his head under the hood of his Camero and explained to the guy what needed to be done. Then the guy shook Bob's hand, hopped into Bob's baby, and sped off.

I finally got to see Bob's first love.

We have had several cars, trucks, min-vans, and off-road vehicles in our 44 years together, but that Camero was always top dog ;-)

Bob was 17 years old in this picture and batching it in the house he, his dad, and his brother built on the upper end of the family property in Cathlamet, so he could finish out his last 2 years of High School with his friends and football team when the rest of the family moved to Toutle.

I had not yet moved to Cathlamet; we still lived in Skamokawa. 7 years later Bob and I married and lived in the big house he lived his youth in on the backside of the family property; and 3 years later, I finally met the love of his life (besides me, of course, who topped the top dog ;-)).

BEAUTY ALL DAY LONG

This morning I woke up thinking I needed to get the rest of whatever I plan to plant this season, into my garden boxes and various container pots. While I was enjoying my morning coffee, and slowly waking up in my cool air-conditioned castle; I noticed a flash of bright color fly past the LV windowpanes and perch in my garden area …

Sunny colored Evening Grosbeak bird – it had a pistachio green tinted beak: colorful all over!

Seeing the colorful visitor made me think of the hummingbird feeders I needed to replace: the past few days I’ve noticed that the large hummingbird feeders, Bob & I had bought and hung together, had seemed to have sprung leaks – I was washing the white railing and porch down every day so the red tinted sugar water didn’t stain the porch railing; they needed replacing.

One more thing from my life with Bob that I am forced to let go of.

If Bob were here, replacing the feeders would not affect me at all. But, Bob is not here, and I feel gut-kicked every time I have to replaced something we did together. Little by little, Bob’s presence in/around this house is disappearing. I don’t like it.

Yesterday, while in town, I swallowed hard, and bought 2 smaller feeders; this morning, I hung them. I am capable of hanging them, but ((((MAN!)))) I sure missed the shadow of Bob’s height and watching his long arms reach up to place them in position. Being the shortie I am, and being a solo lobo now, there will be no more sheltering shadow; no more long arms to ease tasks.

No more gentle giant to hug and kiss.

There is just me.

And I don’t like it.

So, I focus on the beauty that surrounds me in every minute of my new life days. I like watching hummingbirds. I hung the new feeders without trauma drama:

No leaks – no stains ;-)

As soon as I had hung the feeders and came into the house, a hummer was at the feeder :-D

I didn’t see any cracks in the feeder bases, but they sure leaked like a sieve … so into the trash they went this morning: I saved the feeder tubes to store the sugarwater-nectar in; in the ‘fridge.

That task done – and accomplished without tears – I gathered what I would need to finish planting the garden area; and got busy.

I had to pump the wheel barrow wheel again: I really need to break down and get a new tire pump; this one ... bought with Bob, is toast.

1 more thing to be trashed & replaced.

These {replacements} are happening to quickly.

To often.

Do I have to lose everything all at once????

Focus on the beauty, Val; not the loss ...

It was a hot 84-degree-day.

I was HOURS in the sun getting the garden planted & watered.

I am burned: my face, my nape, my arms, my legs, my feet.

My body felt the heat.

It was a beautiful blue-sky day full of promise – and surprises …

While I was filling my watering can, I happened to look up at the sky, and smiled …

My day was filled with beauty from start to finish.

My garden is totally IN; now.

It was a good day :-D

Now, after I post this post, I’m going to take a load off my feet and relax by finishing up the last of the Baby Sweater Jackets I’ve been working on:

I want to finish up the last of the Baby Sweater Jackets I’ve been knitting … and I ran out of yarn. Now what? I didn’t know if I had any more …

I did! I looked in every possible place there might be a small bit of left-over yarn ends. There isn’t a lot, but there’s enough to finish up :-D THANK YOU, YESHUA!