My outside garden area is completely put to
rest until Spring 2021 … and I have pinned baby strawberry plants to take root
overwinter in a soil-filled planter: they will be transplanted to a
permanent planter, later on.
My indoors gardening area, has for the
moment, been transformed into a nursery for rooting Christmas Cactus slips; I
noticed several cactus pads with roots dangling from them, so I separated those
from the mother plant and potted them for the upcoming Bazaar I will be doing
the end of this month – this is the only Bazaar I will be doing this year.
Hopefully, there will be customers, but if not … it will be a ‘get-out-of-town’
day with good chit-chat-company at the Grange.
Creeping Stonecrop sedum
clippings. Spreads quickly. Spruce green leaves, yellow flower stalk. $2.50 Bazaar item – Perennial.
I noticed Christmas Cactus slips of 1 or 2
single potted slips, selling for $5.25 on Etsy; so, at my low price, I am
hoping all of my propagations find new homes October 31st 😉
On another topic … I noticed when I logged on
to FB this morning, that a ‘Memory’ post I had posted this time last year, was
about Riverside Park. Bob and I had walked that Park much of the past 3 decades
– almost daily for the past 15 years, after we had moved to the West Side
Highway area; where we had bought, remodeled, and sold 2 homes before moving
here: where I now live alone.
Seeing that memory pop up on FB, made my
heart happy – and hurt, at the same time.
We had many years of happy memories there.
We had 1 year of heartache
memories there.
Bob’s doctors kept insisting he walk every day
– at least a mile. That was ludicrous given his weakened condition, but he was
game to give it a try.
These pictures were taken October 1st,
2018; the last Park walk Bob and I would ever take together; Bob really did do
very well on this particular walk.
It took all his strength to do
it, but he did it.
The following week after this enjoyable walk, his illness flared
up and he went back into the local ER, ICU, and a permanent hospital room … until
he was transferred to OHSU across the river … and never came home alive again.
Every
few months I drive to Riverside Park and walk the dike trail, but it is a very
difficult thing for me to do now.
This
Park was {our} Park.
We
walked here together, for 30 years. We walked here with our children/grandchildren,
we walked here with our Pomeranian, and later our wolf; we walked here for the
last time, 45 days into Bob’s last 106 days on Earth. Maybe someday it will be
easy again, but for now it is a struggle.
Bob
went back into ER the 2nd week of October ... and never came home alive again.
In OHSU waiting for his heart to stabilize so
the exploratory surgery could take place, Bob was asked by an ER/ICU attendant,
“What would you like to do if the surgery is successful and you are released to
go home?”
Without hesitation, Bob reached for my hand,
and answered, “Walk with my Baby in the Park, and feed the squirrels.”
I hope there are squirrels in Heaven.
Speaking of Heaven, the Hargand’s are, 1
by 1 gaining a good portion of celestial Real Estate up there as family and
friends relocate from here to there.
We lost our lifelong friend, David, in 2014.
That loss was hard for us; we loved him like a brother. David was ‘family’
since 1986; and he was ‘Uncle’ to our daughter and granddaughter. He knew about
Azariah’s approaching birth … but never got to see him because he died a month before
Aza made his appearance.
Bob’s Dad passed in 2015.
I believe Bob had a young 2nd
cousin passed the same year from a long illness; we last saw “little John” at
Bob’s Dad’s funeral – he passed shortly afterward.
Bruce, Bob’s High School/young adult life
friend all through his 1st marriage and into our marriage, died in
2016.
2 of Bob’s Uncles, Fred and Herbie, passed in
2016 & 2017; in that order.
And, of course, my Bob passed in 2018.
2 more of Bob’s relatives passed recently.
I’m just really ready for things to slow
down, in the cemetery department.
Death, and the healing of- is draining.
It’s been a steady yearly drain for years – with little
rebound time.
In the midst of the death drains … both
kids have been energy vampires, sucking the life out of the little charge
left in our backup battery, until both Bob and I were punch-drunk; having taken
so many sucker-punches from both of our self-centered children.
Rebounding from Bob’s physical death is
taking me the longest because it hit me the hardest: and then the kids moved
in for their 1-2-punches in my weakest moment before removing themselves
totally from my life.
I miss Bob.
Greatly.
Every second of every day.
I don’t miss the kids’ brutalizing
interactions.
But Elohim was faithful.
He placed people in my life that enrich my life with kindness, friendly interaction, gentle and appreciative help, patiently aiding me in unfurling my wings and teaching me to fledge with confidence, and love – the kind of philia-agape-love that includes a sharing of lives with no hidden agenda or arranged outcome.
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCyIxWrRPNc).
I like that.
I am mindful … and thankful,
everyday … of the friends, Elohei has sent me these 22 months.
I have a good God, Who greatly loves me/highly
favors me/faithfully provides for me (on every level).
So, this Shabbat, I am thankful for Friends.
Like the budding cactus slips, my life’s which
seemed to have no purpose separated from the life I shared with Bob; new growth
is beginning to show.
Budding with the promise of full flowering, is
also putting in an appearance.
Growth is taking root.
Friends have been the environment in which
growth was possible.
So, this Shabbat, I am feeling blessed.
Growth and friendship: both blessed gifts
from Yeshua; my Husband, Who understands more than I do about my life, and
knows what He revealed to Bob for 44 years …
A happy wife = a happy life.
An emotional and spiritual romance (relationship,
involvement, adventure, enthusiasm, association, saga) 😉
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3I8jVET0B0w)
I am blessed.
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