MAINTENANCE MAN

Well ...

I never was a 'high-maintenance woman'.

But, I wasn't a fool either.

I could ALWAYS find a reason to have my maintenance man at hand ;-)

He was a real GOOD {fixer}; he was a definite hands-on man … and knew how to use his tool.

“Tell me what you want, Baby … tell me what you need … I’m here to please.”

Oh boy!

He was a pleaser, for sure :-D

And he kept the administrations coming, ‘cause I couldn’t get enough of his pleasing me.

Drenched in his kisses … cloaked in his love: totally satisfied with his fixin.

Man!

I miss my man :-(

MY SPECIAL ANGEL

You Are My Special Angel

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8s3JeIIFxA)

I am a military brat.

My mother LOVED music - and that is where I get my love of music from.

My mother has SO MANY 45's that they HAD THEIR OWN ROOM!

And their own traveling arrangement every time we moved from one place to another ;-)

They reached the ceiling from their stacks on the floor ... and we had to walk mazes through them to select one: she always KNEW where everything was located.

I always called this era of music "Angel music" - don't know why: I just always did.

I was 7 months old when this song became a crossover hit - Bob was in the 2nd Grade ;-)

And now, Bob is MY 'Special Angel'.

MY LIFE … IS PRETTY BORING

But, it is mine ;-)

The “To Do” List notations were jotted down a few months ago to force myself to get out and DO things:

My weekly {prod} … pretty boring: and sometimes even this little bit doesn’t even get ‘done’; it all depends on my emotions on any particular day.

I do like to walk; and I like to walk in a variety of locations.

I do like to take daytrips; the drive to Scapoose will take me furthest this year on my solo venturing – and I like to haunt Goodwills because I can find odds and ends hard to find anywhere else, at reasonable prices. I chose Scapoose Goodwill right now, because (1) I have NO idea how to get to the one in Centralia, taking the backroads (Bob KNEW: I don't) (2) I will feel like I am on an adventure 'to another State' (which, is actually quite true), despite the drive being very familiar because we have driven that roadway constantly for the past 44 years. Last time I was there a few weeks ago, I got a real nice Fall vase that I can’t wait to use. And I plan on scheduling some weekend walks at various County Parks … when I feel that I can feel comfortable spreading my wings in that direction: I haven’t yet – but the notation is staying on the “To Do” list {just in case} ;-)

The List IS pretty boring – but, maybe next year I will be more accepting of my new life without Bob in it; and be a little more comfortable in it, and the notations will get livened up a bit.

We'll see.

Today, I watered my garden area; and did some garden prep for approaching the Fall season. And I pulled, sliced & diced the onions too …

Garden watering & Fall prep.

I pulled some carrots that were ready for harvest in this bed; and I hilled the sprouting Leeks, so they have nice long, white, shanks when they mature in the Spring of 2020.

Garden Box cleanup & Spring Bulb pots storage; I’ll snug some fallen leaves around everything when they fall in the Fall – to keep unexpected frost from damaging the bulbs; or the nursery pots.

Stunted Kandy Corn not doing good at all because of the weather.

The Garden Box Bob designed & built for me, is 18” tall – so the corn stalks are VERY stunted this year. I think the "tallest" one is only 3 or 4 feet tall - ((IF)) even that ... and THAT ESTIMATE INCLUDES the height of the box!

Yellow Onions – I already bagged the quartered pieces in the house; these will be diced, and the trimmings spread in the garden box for ‘green compost’. I got 6 ct. Quartered, & 8 ct. Diced. Would have had more if the sun had cooperated this year … also, onion sets never do well here - and onion sets is what I had time for this year. Next year, I plan to start onions to plant, from seed.

While I was slicing & dicing, I happened to notice that the Begonia I bought for Bob’s enjoyment, 11 years ago, is doing a LOT better in this location, under the carport. It is really thriving here. That makes me happy, because he liked it so much. I relocated it a few weeks ago

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/08/haircuts.html).

The Red Onions didn’t do very well at all this year, but I did manage to get 3 ct. Quartered, & 6 ct. Diced. I also pulled & froze the Walla Walla's: and got 8 ct. Quartered & 10 ct Diced. All these onions will get me through the Winter - not sure about the coming Spring before garden season starts anew ...

Onion trimmings laid out in the garden boxes they grew in.

My favorite hose had a blow-out while I was hosing the carrots off ... and this type of hose can't be bought anywhere, anymore: I LOOKED all over town this Spring: NADA. No where :-(

The hose blow-out was LOUD and I jumped a little – but I knew what happened, because the water pressure was reduced to nil while I held the hose sprayer at full force … and the back of my legs immediately got wet with the wildly flying spray. Damn it! One more thing Bob and I bought together that has bit the dust – and it isn’t even that old: we bought it when we bought this house, 2 years ago.

Bob bought me this hose because his Uncle Cliff has one at his house in Oregon, and I commented that I really liked it because there would be no more kinks in my hose if I had one. Bob bought it, and presented it to me with a smile and a chuckle because he knew I hated wrestling my hose.

The loss of that shrinker hose really deflated me. I know it sounds stupid, but when that hose blew, I was hit with an immediate bummer attitude. I am tired of letting go this year – First, Bob … and then CONSISTENTLY EVERYTHING WE HAD TOGETHER, ever after. I’m just really d.o.n.e. with losing things in my life that had Bob’s stamp of love in/on them.

Just once, I’d like something of our life together to remain!

The 2^nd front flowerbed didn’t get watered. I was too bummed out to deal with it. So, I chucked the ruined hose into the trash can, hauled the can out to the curb for tomorrow’s pick up; and went inside the house.

Where my eye caught the stone hearts against the background of Bob’s begonia in the background. Seeing these things made me smile. And it was almost like I could feel Bob winking at me, and telling me, “Everything will be okay Val – the hose was only ‘a thing’, and it really doesn’t mean a thing, because I love you – with or without ‘things’ to remind you of that.”

That thought squeezed my heart.

In a good way.

That thought would be something he would say :-D

The 6 stone hearts that I have found around the rain barrels at the back of the house – Bob’s Orange Begonia hanging in the background.

 (https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2018/05/batman-scarecrow.html)

 (https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/08/love-all-around-me_14.html)

So, smiling, I opened the freezer and pulled some meat packages out, to cook make-ahead-freezer-meals with:

I took stuff out of the freezer to make meals with this week. It was a good variety: Fish-Pork-Chicken-& Beef. I was just grabbing stuff, and wasn’t aware of what I had until I laid it out to thaw: GOOD SELECTIONS for a varied menu ;-)

Bob can STILL brighten up a boring day, and bring an instant smile into my life ;-)

I love you, Babe.

Always.

OX

UNNERVING DEVELOPMENT AT WILLOW GROVE

I got bored sitting around the hose this afternoon, so around 4:30 p.m., I decided to grab another Cheeseburger Basket from the Baker’s Corner Grill, and head out to Willow Grove to eat it.

The sunshine was warming; and my body will appreciate the natural shot of Vitamin D ;-)

It was relaxing. But it was making me nervous too - I don't understand the tides: Bob did though. But Bob is not here now; and the waves were literally moving some of the driftwood near the anchored ship, that at low tide, has quite a stretch of sand between it and the river water:

A steamer clam half-shell dropped by seagulls - those litterbugs! LOL

A feather. Probably from a seagull.

The wind was noisily gusty, and the tide was coming in when I arrived; the lapping waves kept creeping in, moving me further and further back.

Seagulls. The wind gusts - and the waves, kept getting stronger.

I found this Word Search book in the car cubby while searching for paper napkins – Bob always kept one in the car to work on if I had to make a quick stop in a store, and it wasn’t worth him getting out of the car for.

Pages Bob had completed: tears smarted my eyes when I saw his handmarks on the pages … Bob loved doing these word searches. I always bought scads of them - there are 3 more in the bedroom, in his nightstand. Untouched.

After I ate Supper, I decided to sit in the warm sunshine, and pick up where he left off – on page 38.

And I was enjoying the escapade.

Then 2 things happened …

As I was finishing up page 38, a beachcomber stopped right in front of me and lit a cigarette: so, instead of saying, “Do you MIND moving along? I have asthma, you self-centered idiot …”

I mean, REALLY! A vast beachfront, and she has to light up in front of me – where my lungs can’t escape the choking smoke being blown down them on the gusty river winds???

Instead – I gathered my things, and decided to walk along the beach for a while; and saw this crude artsy-fartsy beach shelter, constructed from gathered driftwood beach wood. So, I stopped near it, and sat down on a big driftwood log; and watched the seagulls glide, swoop, and swim – and people watched:

Female kayaker.

After a bit, I got restless & thought I’d walk up towards the kid’s playground area – and back again, to the car: that would be a nice stretch of the legs.

What I saw on that walk concerns me …

The greedy, wild, Columbia River is eroding Willow grove beach.

The paved trail has been scooped out, by wild nature activity.

Serious undermining erosion – it looks like this section is about ready to drop off too.

I don’t like this new development.

I think I’ll be looking for another place to eat my out-of-house-Suppers, I the near future. Water makes me nervous. And rivers do not “call” to me; so, it won’t be like a major sacrifice to eat some place else.

LADIES LOVE COUNTRY BOYS ;-)

I saw Trace when he walked by, one day - HE IS A TALL GUY!

That said ...

Bob always called me his lady: don't know HOW he ever saw a "lady" in this tomboy wearing a ribbed muscle shirt tucked into her ripped jeans; but that was his claim ;-)

This girl loved her country boy.

Actually, I kinda like gawking at most country boys :-D

And Bob was okay with that: he knew I wouldn't stray from my Magic Man's side.

I like the way country boys are self-confident, with big-time {it} power.

AND IT SHOWS.

It shows in the way they stand - tall and confident.

It shows in the way they walk - loose-limbed and self-assured.

It shows in the way they talk - soft and gentle ... or firm and assertive: whatever is needed to get the point across in a no-nonsense way. You always know where you stand with a country boy.

It shows in the way they treat women - with utter respect (whether the respect is deserved, or not).

It shows in the way they honor their wife - they actually LIKE a spunky woman who can hold her own with her man.

It shows in the way they enjoy life - all out, and in for the ride ;-)

It shows in the way they raise their children - with discipline and Godly morals.

It shows in the way they treat their vehicles - their 20-year old pickup will be as spit-n-polish as an executives BMW. Just sayin'. They can't afford a brand-new vehicle every other year - a country boy makes sure his ride will last and hold up: not only because he depends on it to help him get his job done ... but because he trusts it to ferry his lady to and fro in absolute safety.

It shows in the way they smile - NOTHING compares to the sexy slow smile of a self-assured country boy!

It shows in the way he takes care of his body - he depends on his body to back him up in his work days ... and to please his lady when he hangs up his hat and spurs at the end of the day ;-)

It shows in the way he talks - it doesn't matter WHERE a country boy LIVES ... he will ALWAYS TALK WITH A SOUTHERN DRAWL. A country boy just can't help it.

It shows in the way a country boy never loses his sense of direction - he may SEEM confused now and then, BUT he always KNOWS where he is going: and how to get there.

And ladies (or tomboys) just naturally are drawn to a country boy with {it} power :-D

City girls can keep their pampered, suited, perfumed, dandy's.

Ladies like country boys who were raised to pull their own pants on, wear them with manly style, and smell like money well-earned after a long day's work.

Ladies like M.E.N (aka: country boys ;-))

I ONLY WANT TO BE WITH YOU

I was G.O.N.E. ... waaay gone ... when I first saw Bob.

He walked past me on his way back to the High School after eating lunch at the Grade School Cafeteria (the HS didn't get their own cafeteria until the mid 1980's).

My heart panted for him - and I waited by the corner of the school EVERY DAY to watch him as he walked past.

It was pathetic! LMAO

I was 3 months shy of 10 years old: he was 17.

And my heart had been stolen - never to recover.

I only wanted to be with him.

Bob – 1967.

Bob and the first love of his life; his beloved Camero: he bought this car with his own hard-earned $$$. Bob was 17 in this picture.

The next year, I took up my position.

And waited.

For "the face".

HE NEVER CAME.

WTH?

I started asking around: "Where's the face?" I didn't know his name, but everyone knew WHO I was asking about: they had been watching me ;-)

HE GOT MARRIED after graduation!

I was crushed.

I became a teenager. I had a pretty steady boy friend - we had an 'understanding'; and I believe we could have made a good life together. We were friends, and we did care about each other's happiness.

But ... in my heart of hearts, I only wanted to be with 'the face'.

One night in March of 1974, I came face-to-face with THE FACE: and he had a name - I learned the name when I carded him. (https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/04/magic-man.html)

I spilled the beans about the school corner peekaboo, and Bob laughed.

Then he was intrigued. We spent the rest of the night talking and getting to know each other.

Fate was in the works, and we didn't stand a chance of going our separate ways after that unexpected face-to-face meeting.

Bob gave me a jingle 2 weeks later ... and the rest is history ;-)

Our 1^st date – April 19^th, 1974. I was 17; Bob was 24.

We fell into each other's open arms every day from that moment forward.

My heart had been stolen - never to recover.

I only wanted to be with him.
(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/08/making-love-out-of-nothing-at-all.html)

Our Wedding Night – August 27^th, 1974.

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/08/he-said-id-like-to-make-it-with-you.html)

Home after a week’s vaca/Coor’s Beer Run to California – Summer, 1976. I was 18-1/2; Bob was 26.

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/08/haircuts.html)

The afternoon our life together started seriously unraveling … August 30^th, 2018.

Bob was 69; I was 61.

The morning our life together was forever altered - December 14^th, 2018.

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2018/12/widowhood.html)

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/04/planning-bobs-celebration-of-life.html)

For the next 44 years
(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/07/journey-to-center-of-mind-amboy-dukes.html)

We were constantly together; enjoying life. especially after he took early retirement :-D

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/05/get-out-and-walkabout-day.html)

And, even now - I only want to be with him.

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/06/baby-dragonfly.html)

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/08/for-rest-of-my-life-ill-be-loving-you.html)

(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/07/what-i-miss-most-is-intimacy.html)

EASY RIDER STOPPED IN IT'S TRACKS

I was married when I was 17.

I was co-partner in raising Bob's 5 yo son by a previous marriage.

I was pregnant myself, by the time my 18th birthday rolled around.

I was juggling marriage, a stepson, a pregnancy, and school ... as well as maintaining a household - with all that entailed.

I didn't have time to go to the movies: and even if I did, the big screen gave me vertigo. Even then.

I attempted to watch movies on TV; but juggling a marriage, a stepson, a pregnancy, school, and maintaining a household; kinda cut into that time.

I had caught bits and pieces of "Easy Rider" in between what needed to be done in real life: usually laundry needed to be done when TV decided to run "Easy Rider" ... so I never got past the commune scene with Karen Black.

EVER.

The ending of the movie was always a mystery to me.

Until about 10 years ago, when it came on TV late one evening while Bob was working.

I popped some popcorn and DETERMINED to see the darned thing THROUGH TO THE END.

I nearly choked on my popcorn.

And when Bob came home, I told him, "I finally saw the end of 'Easy Rider' - the whole movie is about drug smugglers!"

Bob burst out laughing.

He already knew that.

But, he also knew that I didn't know that because my life had been too busy to ever catch the end of the movie.

I never watched the movie again.

I come from a family with a drug involved background - and though, I, personally, NEVER supported my family in that regard - I was always stigmatized.

Bob knew I hated drugs: I don't use ANY drugs at all - not even prescribed drugs.

Bob knew I always watched that movie simply because Peter was in it.

And he knew, that because of the ending, that movie ... even with Peter as eye candy ... would never be watched in our home again.

Easy Rider would be permanently stopped in it’s tracks as far as I was concerned.

The counter-culture of the 1960's never appealed to me.

AND I WAS RAISED IN IT.