IT NEVER GETS EASY

My heart.

Still HARD weeks to get through.

Still HARD memories to relive.

2023 cannot arrive soon enough ...

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I posted this to FB 4 years ago, today …

{{ feeling emotional.

November 5^th. 2018

Bob was admitted to ER earlier this afternoon and is currently in ICU.

Again.

At first, they were going to transport him immediately to OHSU, but when they called OHSU, docs here were told that there is nothing that could be done there that could not be done here … in OHSU’s estimation based on what was fed to them from ER here, Bob is not {chronically ill enough}. The man is in MASS PAIN! He CANNOT EAT OR DRINK without throwing it back up!

So.

Docs here said all they can do is basically keep him alive with pain killers and IV fluids when the pain is unbearable and the dehydration is critical. Pancreatitis is a wasting disease … he is dying. And he will die by starvation. End of story. A Hospital Chaplain was paged and Bob was moved to ICU where the nurses have been told again that there is a DNR Order standing. If he makes it through the night and is released, he will be on serious narcotics until he does “go home”.

I have loved this man since I was 10 years old. I married him when I was 17 years old. He has been in my life more than 2/3rd's of it. I am not even sure I remember how to breath or live without Bob being part of me.

This is extremely hard to go through. Bob is praying for a healing; or death. I am praying for a healing; or for a dignified death. We are both praying for Elohim’s expressed favor. We desperately need a miracle. Or a graceful exit.

Please pray as the Ruach Ha'Kodesh leads. Thank you.}}

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I had good friends that stood by us (and emotionally held me those long and heartbreaking weeks, with their love & prayers).

Bob did go Home in the early morning hours of December of 2018 – and his life is eminently much better now, beyond the clouds.

Emmylou Harris – ‘Away Beyond the Blue’ song:

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKY99siT8Qc)

I have good friends today, who stand with me in the now, and comfort me with their love and prayers. They make the hard times bearable.

I’m getting my hair trimmed and shaped tomorrow morning … then, I’ll spend the rest of the afternoon hanging with my 3 amigos; each one texted me this morning, and invited me to shared Sunday lunch. I am blessed.

((((THANK YOU, YESHUA 😊))))