SCAPPOOSE SOLOING

Yesterday was an insanely emotional day.

It started off with a trip to the Kelso Courthouse to legally remove Bob’s name from the House Title since he is no longer walking this Earth. A very nice man in the Auditor’s Office saw my deer-in-the-headlights look and helped me get my number ticket to be seen in orderly fashion: I thanked him. When I was seen, with all the papers I was told in December 2018 to bring with me for today’s meeting, I was grilled by a stupid woman who kept asking me, “Do you have the Title?” like a fricking parrot! I finally cut her off after about the 6^th repetition; and said, “I don’t know what you are asking – you have everything in front of you that I was told to bring for this meeting.” So, she – in a smart-assy way – said, “Then I will have to send a form of Title Replacement to the State; you should receive the new Title in about 4 weeks”. I said, “Whatever … as long as the house is legally in my name, so the kids can sell it when I die.” Then, she says, “Actually, you need to go across the hall to the Assessor, then come back here so we can finish this up.”

So, I gathered my papers and went across the hall to the Assessor, telling them I need to legally have Bob’s name removed from the House Title, now that he is no longer here in the flesh … and 2 of the women working there say, “Who sent you here? We don’t handle this; you need to go across the hall to the Treasurer.” I pointed across the hall to the Auditor’s office and said, “I just came from there, where I was told to come here. Now you are telling me to go there” … and I pointed to the Treasurer’s Office across the hall. “Right? I go there (pointing to the Treasurer’s Office) – then I go there again (pointing to the Auditor’s Office) – then I come back here? Do I have this correct?” They shook their heads like puppets.

And I shook my head in frustration.

So, I walk across the hall to the Treasurer’s Office and tell them, “I need to have my husband’s name removed from the House Title” – and I show them the Death Certificate along with all the other papers I was told to bring to get this thing wrapped up. The woman looks at the papers, looks at me, and says, “Who told you your husband needs to be removed from the Title.” I point to the Auditor’s Office, and say, “They did.”

And she says, “Well, they are wrong; he does not need to be removed.”

The whole time, I am thinking, “This is fricking ridiculous! Doesn’t ANYONE in this town KNOW any damned thing? NOBODY IS COMMUNICATING BETWEEN OFFICES.” And, honestly, from what I was witnessing – even if they were communicating, NO ONE KNEW what to do!

And then the tears start rolling down my face.

And I start shaking, while the “unnecessary transfer papers” are being “legally” processed, being told again that I will receive the papers in 4 to 6 weeks’ time.

I left the Treasurer’s Office and walked back across the hall to the Auditor’s Office where things were finally registered, sorted, and filed.

The whole thing was made harder than it needed to be.

And it came on the heels of cutting ties with Bob's son on the 4th - his choice.

Bob kinda knew this would happen with Alex, but still it makes my heart hurt for Bob that his own son is so disrespectful to both of us, and dishonors his father with his petulant behavior. A 50 year old should know better. But, Alex behaves like he is 5 years old - he has never gotten over his parent's divorce; and he has NEVER in 45 years accepted me, or his sister. He never will. He's done. I'm done. It's finished. Maybe now, we will all finally have some peace.

And I left the Courthouse hoping and praying the clueless morons staffed there got things straight and didn’t “legally” screw me over with their cluelessness.

Times like this, I REALLY NEED BOB.

But Bob is not here anymore …

Then, it was on to the Department of Licensing to “legally” get Bob’s name off the Car Title: this actually went quickly and efficiently.

Leaving the DOL, ‘Scappoose’ popped into my head: so I rolled with it.

I drove home first to safeguard the legal papers I had been carrying around with me for an hour & half … then I headed out of Longview – I needed to put as much distance between me and the deadheads as I comfortably could. Scappoose, Oregon, I know – and it is a nice, relaxing, country drive too.

After all the little-town-pretending-to-be-a-city deadhead stupidity, I needed nice, and relaxing, and especially country ;-)

Hitting the road, I crossed over the Rainier Bridge that spans the Columbia River separating Washington from Oregon:

I hate crossing bridges, but have no choice: Scappoose, OR is across the river. My stomach was lurching, and I prayed fervently there would be no accidents that would tie up traffic moving steadily forward. Please God!

Coming off the bridge is Scappoose to the left – and Clatskine to the right; up the hill: I’ll do Clatskine later on sometime - there is a burger bar there, Bob and I have frequented off-and-on, over the past 45 years, and it is worth the drive.

Coming up on the defunct Trojan Nuclear Plant, I see that the Stop-In has been bought, revamped, renamed … and being passed off as a decent place to stop in. For decades it has been a topless strip bar where criminal bikers and other low-lifes would hang out with prostitutes, drug dealers, and prison minded riff-raff: really a nasty place all the way around. The shoddy trailers where the prostitutes plied their business is also gone. Now it is a Burger Bar/Minute Mart.

Well, I hope it makes it. I really do …

Closer to Trojan, I always smile when I pass this place. We drove this way 98% of the time to collect Alex weekends the first 12 years of our married life until he got his driver's license (then he rarely made the time to see his Dad. and I enjoyed the peace) - then later transported grandchildren to and fro; our entire married life, because Bob knew I preferred a country drive over the frantic freeway madness: we took the freeway when Bob was super tired and wanted to get home fast.

One afternoon the first year of our marriage, it was raining; and I was hugely pregnant, when we made the drive. We were coming into this corner here, when a dog ran across the roadway. I screamed and shouted, “Don’t hit the dog!” Bob locked the wheels up, put his big right hand across my bulging stomach … and skillfully slid the ’56 Ford truck sideways down the road. When we finally came to a rest, he looked in my eyes and asked, “Are you okay?” I nodded & said I was; then added, “For a minute there I though our baby would be born among the cattails.” Bob didn’t see the humor in the moment. His lips got thin and tight and he said, “Next time, I hit the damned dog!” I knew when to shut up – so I did. THEN. But for the next 44 years, I always laughed when we got to this point in the road, and would ask, “Do you remember when …” And Bob always gave me {that look}. And thankfully, no more dogs darted out of the weeds to run across the road. LOL

Past the hulking and abandoned Trojan Nuclear Plant, is Gobel; where Bob & I used to explore side roads off the road to the right – and where Cheryl & Mike took me strawberry picking a few weeks ago 
(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/06/going-up-to-country.html):

I saw 2 Lemmon’s Trucking trucks around Deer Island, and checked them out to see if either were the truck Bob drove before he retired from Lemmon’s – neither were. I was disappointed – and glad – at the same time.

Nearing the town of St. Helens, Oregon, I drove the stretch of road, where – a few years ago – we passed a pickup truck driven by a drunk, and I was subsequently flagged over by a cop, who came outta nowhere, like a bat outta hell … I was moving pretty fast myself passing the truck. I saw the red and blues flashing in the rear-view mirror and pulled over as quickly as I could – and schooled the cop: I was nice about it, but I did bend his ear. And he let me go …

I passed a drunken driver here – we had followed the zig-zagging truck all the way from Rainier (a good half hour or more), and as soon as I could, I put my foot down and passed him: his erratic driving scared me and I just wanted to be away from him.

When I finally pulled over (in front of the white building in the picture), and the cop pulled in behind me and started reading me the riot act, I said, “You didn’t see that truck that was all over the road from one white line to the next? You didn’t think it was necessary to pull HIM Over? I wanted to get away from him as soon as I could – so I did. You keep telling me that I didn’t need to speed up … but YOU sped up to flag me over. And while we are standing here debating the need to speed up, he is crazily careening down the road where he will eventually kill himself, or someone else with his crazy driving.” When I finally stopped talking, the cop let me go and called in to his fellow cops to be on the lookout for the drunken driver.

In St. Helen’s I passed Bing’s Restaurant where for 12 years running, we would eat, on the return trip back home after dropping Alex off at his Grandmother’s in Portland; and the Ford Dealership where Bob bought his 2-tone Green & White Diesel truck 24 years ago:

Bob knew I liked Chinese food, so this was his treat to me once a month after our Portland trip. Bob wasn’t a Chinese food devotee when we got together – but after a while, he learned to like it ;-)

Bob bought his diesel truck here. Our granddaughter Alyna, called it “the pickle” – that always cracked us up.

Further down the road, in Warrren, this side of Scappoose, is the Country Inn Restaurant, where we used to stop and eat breakfast after Bob’s granddaughter Krisaleee, was born: and we were driving back and forth to Lincoln City, OR, which was about a 3-1/2 hour trip from Cathlamet, WA – where we lived at the time, to bring her back with us for a few weeks' visit  before taking her back to Lincoln City. We ate here because it was kid-friendly; and from 1990, we always had kids with us, until recently. This was a good place to eat with kids …

Warren Country Inn Restaurant is owned by the Baptist Church next to it.

Just before entering Scappoose, I saw the big shed where a perpetual garage sale is always happening. Most of it is junk, but sometimes – like a few years ago, when we browsed it with friends – there are useful things found. Jim and Karen were talking to us one day about checking it out and asked if we’d like to do it with them, so we said, “okay”: I think I was the only one who walked away with anything that day. Bob said he ‘wasn’t surprised’. LOL

I carried home a LOT of big nursery pots to garden in. Still have them; and are using them now.

When I finally reached Scappoose, I browsed a bit and eventually left with some clothing items I think Bob would like, if he were here to say one way or the other.

And I cried on the way home, because I miss him beside me.

I’d rather not be soloing:

Back in Rainier, about to cross the bridge again, I’m thinking I may be bold enough to climb that hill yonder, and tackle Clatskine too, sometime this year …

And later last night, I slept on Bob’s side of our bed.

I miss him.

A LOT.

Sleeping on his side of the bed soothes me after a particularly stressful day - and yesterday morning was extremely stressful:

After the early afternoon ridiculousness, and the emotional drive back home from Oregon, I needed soothed.

I love you, Babe.

Always.

OX

HA! IT WORKS!

4 years ago I found out I suffer severe anaphylactic reaction to wasp stings: the left side of my face swelled grotesquely, my heart rate accelerated like I had run for my life, my lips started tingling, I got nauseous, and my tongue swelled so, it really did concern me - I already have trouble breathing without a swelled tongue complicating things.

I went to the Pharmacy after that experience to buy an EpiPen and was told I will need a prescription for an EpiPen, which runs as high as A THOUSAND DOLLARS!

So ...

Because I am not as rich as the medical people seem to believe I should be, and life-saving medicines are withheld UNLESS you are willing to spend $500.00 a minute to listen to a stuffy doctor tell you what you ALREADY KNOW, I will forego the EpiPen. I just do not have $2,000 to spend freely in under half an hour's time.

I got these Wasp-Hornet-Yellow Jacket traps at Lowe's the other day. They are a LOT cheaper; hopefully they will keep the winged demons away from me. I have limited “shaded” area here at the Park, so I have to make do with what I have – the trap went up in the carport … by an entrance, but I can’t help that: I need the trap, and the carport is the ONLY shaded spot on my lot. Actually, I bought the traps to put in the garden area because that is where I see wasp and yellow jacket activity, but the instruction say to keep the traps away from food sources, and out of direct sunlight; so I hope the winged demons smell the trap’s enticement odor and wing their way from the garden to the carport … and into the trap.

The instructions were real simple (Thank you, Yeshua!) for simple-minded people like me, and it went together quickly:

Learning to do on my own.

Keep it simple, and I can do it ... make it complicated, and I am like a deer in the headlights: frozen and brain-dead.

Trap hung with a hope & a prayer: if I followed the instructions correctly, it should work and do it's thing.

My daughter told me when she was here the other day and heard about my anaphylactic episode, that next time I may die when stung if I don’t get to ER fast. I am not going to get wigged out about it and live in fear just because Bob is no longer here to help me when I need help: IF I get stung and die, that's okay - I KNOW where I am headed. Death does not scare me; life as we know here on Earth, it is only an illusion. And Yeshua & Bob are waiting for me ;-)

I looked out the kitchen window a few minutes ago and SAW this ...

HA! I figured it out ... and it IS working! It feels good to know I am not stupid.

LIVE LIKE YOU WERE DYING

This song sums up the last 38 years with my husband.

When he died the first time in 1978, he had gone into the hospital with a broken thigh bone. The surgeon told me that if no one came to talk to me in 4 hours to tell me everything went fine, they may have to amputate the leg: I cried. Then I prayed. HARD. 8 hours came and went … I thought of gentle ways to break the news to my husband that his leg was gone: I was 21, Bob was 28. BUT, word came to me that the leg had been saved! I thanked Elohim – Bob still had a wild streak in him. He was always a good man, but he was also just a man, he went out with the boys once in a while. And boys will be boys – that was how his leg ended up broken.

The second time he died in 1981, is a mystery – docs’ never did figure that one out: he was working away from home, staying in our travel trailer on our friend’s property and coming home on weekends. One night he went to their son’s football game; they came home and were at Supper table, talking & laughing about the game; when he just killed over on his plate. Literally. Bill jumped up and started CPR, Punkie ran for the phone and called for help. 2 ambulances from 2 counties showed up because their property line was on the boundary line for both counties – Bob had been out for 10 minutes by then, and the EMT’s worked on him for another 15 minutes. Bob was pronounced dead after those 25 minutes of unresponsiveness. The kids were crying, Punkie and Bill were shell-shocked. The EMT’s were gathering up their equipment and arguing over who got the corpse – Bob’s body had to go somewhere, but nobody was clear exactly where. During the bickering and the start of zipping of the body bag, Bob’s body started quivering on the left side, his eyes opened, he sat straight up, and said, “WOW! I think God means business this time!” SCARED EVERYONE HALF TO DEATH when this happened, is what I was later told. Cowlitz county EMT claimed Bob at that point and quickly loaded him into their ambulance and whisked him to St. John’s Hospital in Longview. Punkie called me to tell me what was going on. I did not drive then – there was no need to: we lived in a little town called Cathlamet, 45 minutes out of Longview, and everything I ever needed was only 3 minutes away (https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/07/sunday-funday.html). Seriously; so I didn’t drive. I had been praying for Bob’s salvation, so I told Punkie that I was positive Bob would be okay – I just knew in my spirit that he would be saved – physically and spiritually. Long story short: HE WAS. He was saved from the moment Elohei resurrected him in Bill and Punkie’s dining room, and he lived the next 38 years a solid Christian, unashamed to tell everyone he ever met how he got saved and why they need to be saved; he wasn’t pushy about it, but he always told the story of his death which led to real living.

When Bob ended up in ER on August 30^th, 2018; on his birthday, he told me on the 5 minute drive to the hospital, “Honey, I don’t think I’ll be coming home this time.” I didn’t want to hear that! How could he possibly KNOW something like that? I said, “Let’s just find out what is happening.” He had thrown up at the house, and it didn’t look right … it scared me – so I pretty much forced him into the car to go to ER, while I quickly stuffed the diaper bag and snatched our grandson up and hustled him into the car too. We don’t run to doctors for every little thing – but THIS was a BIG thing: we had no idea just how big it really was until he was admitted and examined. The first thing we heard as soon as he was looked at, was, “Your husband is dying.” I could not believe my ears! WHY? What on earth??? We just looked at each other, and I burst out bawling. Then I called our daughter and told her that her dad was in the hospital dying and she needed to come get our grandson; her daughter and her fiancé drove up with her. Bob’s body started shutting down and he eventually ended up in ICU – I called his son, Alex, and I called Bob’s family the next day. Everything was happening SO FAST, and everyone wanted answers I did not have: I was as surprised and confused as they were. But I KNEW Bob did not want to be on life support machines, so I told the doctors to remove it all; that Bob wanted to die naturally. THAT UPSET EVERYONE and I was the bitch of the hour. But I turned my ears off and focused all my attention on my husband – HE was the ONE that MATTERED: and I would honor HIS wishes even if it meant getting the death glares from everyone else, and eventually going toe to toe with his mother and sisters, who wanted to grab him and run across the state line with him “to save Bobby from Val.” It was a crazy nightmare. But the doctors stood by me. They removed the life support apparatuses, and I said, “If he rallies through the night, changes his mind, and tells you himself he has changed his mind and wants it all – do what he says.” Well, Bob DID rally through the night (https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2018/09/fall-cleanup-and-forgiveness.html), and he told them that he did not want to be on life support machines & that they were to hear me & DO what I said when he could not tell them himself what they needed to know. But he did agree to the heart monitoring, the nasal oxygen tube, pain shots … and towards the end, the feeding tube (which caused him to vomit, so it really was worthless), and 3 blood transfusions at OHSU. This went on from September to December 2018. I was so alone, and so afraid: there was ONLY Elohei to talk to. So I really wasn’t truly ever alone – but I felt like it when the nights got long and the days got upside down. And I wanted to DO what my husband wanted – I wanted to honor him because I loved him; and I felt that I was dying too. I wanted to die: Bob was my life; how could I live without him? Bob literally put his life in my hands. BUT I only had to make that life or death decision ONCE – those 4 months Bob was dying and refusing to be a medical guinea pig, Elohim was faithful and kept him lucid enough to make the decisions that would affect the outcome of what was unfolding. Bob was able to make his own decision right up to his final breath. THANK YOU YESHUA! The family still thinks I made all the decisions, but they don’t know anything except what they think they know.

This song, from the moment it was released always made me smile. It made me smile because it described how Bob and I have lived our life together since he died, and was returned to us in 1981. We lived life to the fullest, never taking a single second for granted.

And I believe, that because we “lived like we are dying” that when it was time for Bob to let go, there were no regrets. There was no struggle to hang onto life with a death grip “to make it right”. We had a GOOD life together. We did A LOT of things together. We never put off anything, because we knew life was never a guarantee – if we wanted to do something and could do it, then we did it: we didn’t wait until there was more time, more money, more possible enhancement of whatever it was we wanted to do. Because the doctors did not know what had caused him to be dead for 25 minutes in 1981, we couldn’t afford to “wait” things out … we ran with it and never looked back.

That was how it was when death came knocking in August 2018. In November, when Bob looked at me and said we needed to start thinking about his death and cremation, I didn’t want to do that … but I knew I had to do that. For him. For me. For our family & friends. So, I listened and I agreed. And I thought back on all those 38 years that we had been graced with … and it didn’t seem so hard to give back to Elohim what He had been faithful to return to me those 38 years ago. I KNOW that Bob is in Heaven, having the time of his life, enjoying a life I can only imagine until I, too, join him there
(https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2018/12/widowhood.html).

SUNDAY FUNDAY

Yesterday morning I woke up and was just lying there, not really thinking, and not really wanting to move either; there didn’t seem to be any real point.

But then a thought popped into my head, “Sunday Funday”.

And I went with it …

I jumped out of bed and into some comfy clothes and decided to go for a drive.

It wasn’t a new destination, but it was getting out of the house and doing something. Bob & I were always day-tripping. And I miss doing that. It won’t be as much fun as I had when we did things together, but I need to get past that thinking.

So yesterday morning was a good time to start making new soloing traditions.

Cheryl has been saying she wanted to go sit on a beach – she likes Seaside, but that is really quite a distance away, and if we went I’d want to spend the night; and not sure she’d want to do that. But there used to be a beach on Puget Island, called “Sunny Sands.” So, I thought I’d drive there and check it out – and while up that way, I’d walk through Cathlamet too, and revisit our past there: my past with Bob, and my past with Cheryl as a sister in law back then; and a very welcome friend now. I have to pass through Cathlamet to get to Puget Island, so it made sense to do both:

Ocean Beach Highway, past Stella.

Being a good girl and staying in the 'slow lane'.

Coming up on County Line Rest Area: the banks just past this spot, were lined with people fishing. I think salmon is running now.

NASA Point. Puget Island Bridge in the distance: when I reach this point, I know home is just over the hilltop ... even though I know that Cathlamet is not really my home anymore, it still draws me because it was home for half of my life.

Cathlamet is just over the hilltop ...

Well.

I was in for several surprises. It was sad to see the Golf Course, Ralph Rodahl designed in 1965 – and Bob & I enjoyed golfing on, in 1974 thru 1978 (Bob by himself later on, bringing home 1^st Place trophies and awards), has fallen on hard times: I didn’t see the huge Clubhouse that used to be at the top hole, but saw instead a little ratty shack they tell me is the new club house.

WTHeck?

Bob and I really liked spending time on the course. There were no carts then, but that was okay – we both had a nice set of legs on us ;-) The course was great to play and walk, and the view of the Columbia River from the top hole was simply beautiful …

Gragg's Store. Used to be Rodahl’s Store & Golf Course, then Phil's Highway Market.

Inside the revamped Gragg's Store. Found out yesterday, Paul Gragg recently died without warning.

I drove up the hill, to a street I though would take me to the Club House and was surprised to see this street sign: I couldn't believe a street was actually named after a wife-beater and a pedophile. Wally Cochran was a pig.

Nice view. I never did find the fancy Clubhouse …

NAPA Auto Parts Store. I asked at the store where the Club House to the Golf Course was; and was told to follow the gravel road directly behind NAPA that leads to the Golf Course.

2-bit shack that replaced the fancy Clubhouse that used to sit at the top of the course hill? Sad.

Mace's Drive-In hamburger joint. Used to be Bacon's Drive-In originally. Stacey worked here in HS. Bob & I ate a LOT of burgers here growing up. This was the place to BE after football, basketball, baseball & Track meets. It is sad to see it reduced to a junk yard.

High School Mascot. And literal frame of mind of Cathlamites. LOL

Elementary & Jr High School. Fenced off now. Surprised about that.

That corner on the small building, is where I first saw Bob walk past me 52 years ago, in 1967. Cupid’s arrow made a direct hit with me and every single fella after that was measured by the one who ignored me. LMAO

The High Schoolers', until the 1980’s when the High School installed a cafeteria of its own, would walk down to the grade school cafeteria to eat lunch every day and follow that well-beaten path back to their school. Fences & crosswalk markings are new.

Wahkiakum High School.

The covered area at the Elementary School was where outside High School dances were held in the summer months during the 1970’s. Bob went to 1 dance with me here when we were dating – after that 1, we went to Grange dances where it was safe for him to be with me without deputy harassment.

Wahkiakum High School.

The white posts mark the end of the school property, and that is where Bob would wait for me after school let out if the woods shut down early because a fire ban was in place. That is county road, and it was legal for him to park there - the forefront is school property, and him being 24, was taboo to him.

Down the hill from the schools, and down the hill from Main Street, Bob used to water ski right there in the river; being towed behind his cousin’s jet boat. Bob was awesome to watch because he was so agile … and SO handsome too with his sun-kissed skin, muscled arms, and those white cutoff shorts that showed his tan and manly legs to maximum advantage ;-) I had “it” bad! And “it” never abated. LOL

Cathlamet has been citified. I didn’t like the atmosphere at all, though I DO MISS the feeling of {home} I always have when I think of Cathlamet. Every once in a while, I fantasize about living there again … but that is not logical at this time in my life, for many reasons. BUT I CAN VISIT occasionally. It is only about half an hour from where I live now, in Heron Pointe:

Directly across from the river view, is the house my family bought when we moved to Cathlamet in 1971. It was white. There used to be a white picket fence marking the drop-off edge, & the porch railing wasn't there.

Main Street Cathlamet

Cathlamet Grocery Store has changed hands several times through the years. Now it is basically just a tourist trap store similar to Apello’s in Longbeach. So crowded with tourist snare stuff that you can barely walk safely through the aisles without bumping into stuff, or knocking things over.

Used to be where the Arcade was. Bob and I used to play pool there because I was underage – and the bar scene really didn’t interest me.

Used to be Judy’s Salon; I got my hair cut here, and so did my our daughter.

That building with the big window behind my car, used to be Dr. Avalon’s Office before he moved down by the Marina in the 1980’s.

Maria’s Restaurant is a new business. Food was good; expensive, but good.

The brick building used to be The Spar, an old-fashioned soda jerk place High Schooler’s hung out at – and by the time I was old enough to get through the doors, it had been sold and bought and renamed, Marie’s; which really was a good restaurant and I frequented it quite a bit before and after I married Bob. The side Office was Peak's Realty.

This hulking monstrosity was Mickey’s Tavern & Café. It was a Pizza place in the 1980’s. Now it is vacant. I think everyone in Cathlamet has at one time worked there at some point.

The Eagle Office. Local Newspaper. Bank is next to it. When the bank first opened up in Cathlamet in the 1970’s, that was welcome news. But we continued to Bank in Longview, just the same as we (I) do now.

The far end building used to be the Post Office with neat, old, post boxes; the Cathlamet Hotel was in the center, and the Pharmacy used to be next to the hotel. Don’t remember what was in the other windowed building.

The Pharmacy moved over here the middle of the 1970's. Roy Labarge was another wife beater and pedophile. And he was just plain mean. Selfish & greedy too. I never liked Roy, and the feeling was mutual. We actually got into it twice because I don’t take bullying very well. Let’s just say, I GOT what I was wanting from the Pharmacy window. I can't stand bullying men and take them to task like a little ankle biter would.

This building used to be the local 5 & Dime – Bacon's Mercantile, then Elliott's Landing; fancy names for an odd's ‘n ends store ...

Wahkiakum Courthouse.

Pype’s Resturant. It was very upscale cuisine & had theatrical floor shows, BUT the Pype’s were not very upscale people. They bought the hotel and this old house, and built a breezeway for the family to walk from their hotel home to their restaurant. It was common knowledge they were connected to a New York mobster cartel – everyone knew drugs and laundered money passed hands here. They were finally run out of town, jumped the river, and opened another restaurant in another old house in Rainier, Oregon. That went belly-up as well – for the same reasons.

The Bradley House was a private home until the late 1970's. Then it became the town Library. Very fancy inside. Not sure what it is now - could be a B & B.

I used to sit here on this retaining wall and watch people go by. Bob later told me he used to see me sitting there while refueling the Crew Bus after work. That observance was before we met face-to-face and started dating.

Carriker’s Gas Station used to be right here on this corner across from the Bradley House. There is nothing there now …

One day, when walking home from uptown, Stacey and I watched with mouths open as a swarm of swallows went crazy and started suicidal dives down Julia Butler Hansen’s house chimney: it was just like that bird scene in the movie, “The Birds”. What a stinking mess that must have been when the dead birds were discovered by whoever was in charge of maintaining her home while she was not in residence …

Every day I walked past this quaint little house, and admired it: all through High School, and even after Bob & I married, and Stacey was born. One day she came out and asked me to come in and have tea with her! I didn’t know she was an important person until several years later. I think she liked that I didn’t treat her special ... she could just be herself with me.

Julia Butler Hansen and I had tea together many times; she liked our tea times; and she enjoyed Stacey playing in her back yard. To me, she was just my elderly friend who treated my daughter like a granddaughter. Julia Butler Hansen was a great Lady. Very kind. A privilege to know.

I always liked this wrought iron gate with its lion face. It's very old - could even be cast iron; the real thing.

This used to be the Optometrist Office in the 1970's. Dr. Pierce was very kind and took time with his patients - not like the money-grubbers today.

Paint and wallpaper store; I think they even had plumbing stuff here too.

Bob’s family house (and later, our house together) was down this street from main Street, past Julia Butler Hansen’s house. I walked this walk every day for 21 years: 18 of those years as wife and mother.

Museum to the left ... our house to the right at the bottom of this little hill. I noticed that the Museum is now called 'Strong's Museum’. Strange, since Bob's Smalley Family Memorabilia is most of what the museum is about: I don’t think there is any connection at all to Gene Strong or his wife. Just sayin’.

The upper end of what used to be the Hargand property. Bob & I lived on the back end, in the big family house – his brother, Ralph, & his wife at the time, Cheryl, had a very nice modern trailer home here for 12 years. This house is the house Bob, his Dad, and his brother Ralph built for Bob to finish out his final High School years in when the rest of them moved to Toutle; it has been added to over the years. The 2 jutting rooms are new additions, as is the deck. The built-up area where the truck sits is also new.

This is where I walked from our back door to Main Street every day as long as we lived in Cathlamet. The hedges were not there - it was all open area.

The rock gardens and fence line back there used to be all open area between the Hargand brothers’ homes.

New Fire Hall – fancy, but not very small town anymore.

Bill Swift and his family used to live here in one of the Hargand rentals; they eventually bought it from Bob Sr., in the 1980’s. I understand the house burnt down a few years ago and the city built this newer house for the Swift’s. The sidewalks are all new.

Before the Fire hall was built, there used to be a huge cement pavement area at this 2nd & Una corner, where an old gas station stood: the neighborhood kids would congregate here and skate, ride bikes, skate board, ect. It was the kids’ hang-out place and parents always knew where the kids were and could keep an eye on them.

Used to be the Wendell House. The decks, huge upper window, & carport are new additions. There was an ancient tree in the front yard, but when the Election day storm blew through during Clinton's Presidential march down Pennsylvania Avenue, I heard it be shattered by the high winds that destroyed trees all around the area.

Used to be the Quigley house: my 2nd cousin, Lisa Anderson, lived here with her 1st husband – his last name was Quigley. It was white then; and didn't have a deck.

The Sturdevant house was taken down to build this end of the new Fire House; the Nettles lived there for a while too.

Agnus Larson lived in this house until the 1980's. She loved Bob & she treated Stacey like a granddaughter; baked her cookies and invited her in to play sometimes … she must have missed having little kids around. The house used to be white with yellow trim, and those stupid rocks were not there. Lilacs and a white picket fence with a gate used to face the street, and run around the entire house.

The Johnson house is gone. Never could see the Marina from here before.

I’ve only revisited our old house twice in the 25 years we’ve been gone from Cathlamet – once Alyna was 5 years old and I wanted to show her where her mother had grown up … I was sorry I did that because the people who bought it had taken out the 2 apple trees, the pear tree, the plum tree, the current bushes, the blackberry bushes, the rose bushes and lilac tree; and built a metal garage on the garden plot. They also changed the physical appearance of the house itself, and removed the grass, replacing it with beach rock and silly looking round raised beds made out of cemented river rock that had dead plants in them. The side porch is a new addition too.

The current owner appears to have planted a line of trees along the fence-line, and dumped dirt over the beach rock to seed with grass – without first leveling the dumped dirt. I KNOW better than to revisit the house I was a happy  bride and wife in; but something draws me back, and I am always disappointed:

The Marina seen from the upper end of our old driveway.

Our old address – I see that the Knowles house is gone.

Our old driveway. It has been blocked off from curling around the back of the house. I spent quite a few days backing up this driveway until I could do it in my sleep without running off it on either side. I wanted to make Bob proud of me, and let him know that I HAD been paying attention to what he had been trying to teach me.

Our old house has been changed in appearance - and the driveway has been raised to rest on a rise. And they painted the house that terrible town buildings color! The town is obsessed with this unappealing drab brown. YUK!

I walked up to the side door and knocked. I wanted to take some pictures of the house and property - and to see what the back yard, by the slough looked like now. We used to have a resident Great Blue Heron, cute playful Otters, and a Harbor Seal that would come close to the back yard when we lived here. No one was home to ask.

Local Brewery. New.

Looks like tourist rentals.

River Mile 38 Brewery

Elochoman Marina Cabins. New.

More tourist rentals. New.

Used to be Dr. Avalon’s Office after he moved from Main Street. Now a family health center.

Neglect. So sad to see.

Used to be Schroder’s Restaurant, and it was a pretty fancy place; built in the 1980’s. Stacey worked here in HS. So sad that it has been so neglected.

And that is the end of this short loop of Cathlamet ... Ocean Beach Highway in the back.

Making the loop back to Main Street. the streets are so short, you can see the Fire Hall very clearly from here.

Faubian’s Law Office.

Used to be the Optometrist’s Office when he moved from Main Street. Then, it was a Yarn Shop during the 1980's.

This used to be another bank in the 1980’s; now it is just a Pizza place.

I used to know everyone on this street: Sharon Lee lived this end, then Donnie Seaburg, then the Cleaveland family.  Jimmie Lou Cleavland helped me get my Driver’s License in the '80's so me and the kids could go visit Bob in Glenoma when he was working and living away from home 9 months out of the year for several years. Donnie Seaburg was Bob's friend all through High School and Bob's 1st marriage. Sharon Lee and I were friends for at least 2 decades - our kids grew up together.

Linquist house. Ruthie is a shirt-tail relative of Bob's – her mother was his Aunt Vivian's sister.

The Love family lived here until the 1980’s. The house used to be white with a white picket fence. That gravel and the garage was not there before.

KOI HOUSE. I forget the lady's name, but she was a spinster with a very gentle spirit; and had 2 big fat spoiled Persian cats with long white hair, and a huge koi pond with monster koi swimming in it. She would let Stacey feed the fish, and play with her cats. It is sad to see that this house is not loved anymore; it used to be kept up so well.

Used to be the Assembly of God Church. Stacey and I went here for 10 years before they went off the rails with the vineyard cult doctrine.

I might come see what they do now for this festival … it’s been decades since I’ve been to a Bald Eagle Day event. I’m curious.

Ocean Beach Highway again: told you Cathlamet was only an eye blink town. LOL

And here we are; right back where I started the walkabout.

Ad for ATM machine – definitely citified.

Heading towards my car on the opposite side of Main Street.

Margaret Strubey’s Flower Shop used to be in this building after the P.O. was moved under the Pharmacy that was moved across the street ...

Cathlamet Hotel.

I don’t know what this building is supposed to stand for: very chaotic window display.

Here is the city beast …

Eagle Office, the local newsletter-newspaper. And I am back to my car after a leisurely 5 minute walk along ALL of Main Street, ALL of Marina area, and ALL of the few back streets. If Bob hadn’t been working away from home, I probably would never have gotten my Driver’s License; I really didn’t need it. Everything I could ever have wanted when we lived here, was only a few seconds away. Seriously. It is a 5 minute walk to walk all of Cathlamet: it is a 7 to 8 minute uphill walk to reach either school from where we lived down on the flats by the Marina.

I headed towards Puget Island to find Sunny Sands.

Sunny Sands no longer exists: beach houses have been built literally right on the beach; basically, eating up the beachfront and cutting off public access. There IS a sliver of public access further down the road, BUT you have to have a Discovery Pass now to walk the 6 ft. x 6 ft. sliver. CRAZY! Not gonna happen with me because it is not worth it. I would get the Pass if there was something to DO once the access was granted, but there isn’t – so I won’t …

Puget Island Bridge. Long bridges usually make me very nervous, but I have to master that feeling and bring it under control if I plan to do more Sunday Fundays …

An Osprey in its nest!

Cutting straight across the Island; no time to drive all the side roads today. I am on a mission ;-)

I went to a lot of Junior High-High School dances here before Bob and I started dating.

Storage Units. Something new.

This building used to be a Grange. I had Girl Scout banquets here when I was young. Now it is a church. That awful color again!

Toll Ferry access road.

The Ferry.

A dredging barge.

EUREKA!

Disappointment ...

Only a sliver of what the beach used to be. Sunny Sands beach used to be so vast that there was a beach shack on it, with sand stretching far out before it, even before water met sand; people would bring beach chairs to sit all day in the sun ... kids played with beach toys on it; people swam here, and had picnic days - like would happen on any big beach. People fished for sturgeon and salmon. Now, they are fishing, but there is barely room for a beach chair between sand dune and waterline! This is ridiculous - it certainly does NOT warrant a Discovery Pass.

Taking a loop road back towards the Bridge; Wayne Moore scared Shannon Spears here.

The Scott house at the end of the bridge, on the Cathlamet side. The Scotts' were always punks; thought they were better than everyone else. Bob didn't like them at all. Could my tormentor, Candy Scott, be a relative? She sure behaves like it!

When I got back to the mainland, I was hungry and decided to eat at the new restaurant there (new to me, anyway). Truthfully, I wasn’t sure I could eat, even though I was hungry: but I made myself DO it … and I didn’t choke on the hamburger, or break down seeing the empty place across the table from me:

I paid tourist price for this hamburger with onion rings & a coke: $17.00! And that concludes my Cathlamet-Puget Island/Sunday Funday

I am healing. My thoughts aren’t so scattered – and my amputated heart is learning a new rhythm. My love-sick and love-starved heart will always limp along now that I am a solo lobo; but at least the pain is lessening, and it isn’t seizing up like it used to do.

A LOT of money has been funneled into Cathlamet to make it over into a yuppie encampment for the fake hippies that blew in here in the 1970’s and started buying properties up left and right – these lucky mud swindlers had old money resources and high-end college diplomas, with ties to mob activities and drug dealing. They are not as innocent or peace-loving as they put forth. And they effectively shut down the woods work and fishing businesses too.

It is really sad.

When I left our past behind us, and started heading home, I decided to take the backroads home through the Elochoman Valley, up over Beaver Creek Road, and cut over Germany Creek Road that ties into Eufaula Heights that ties into Coal Creek Road … which drops right into my back yard here at Heron Pointe on Ocean Beach Highway. A long and winding trail back home for sure, but a FUN drive to round out my Sunday Funday ;-)

Davenport house on the Elochoman Valley Road. Bob almost drowned me here when he got saved in 1981, and we were baptized together – he floated – and my arm was around his waist while his body refused to be dunked! Finally, it was a done deal and I could pop up out of the water and breathe again. But it got dicey for a few minutes. We laughed about that for decades, until the laughter was permanently halted in December 2018.

I was helping Bob spot Elk up Beaver Creek road one day when we were dating. I had never seen an elk before and really didn’t even know what I was looking FOR, but I got an up-close & personal view of an Elk when it ran up the road in front of the pickup ON THIS SPOT – and I was so startled, I couldn’t even speak: it was as big as a horse! I just started tugging on Bob’s shirt sleeve until he finally turned and slammed on the brakes. What an introduction!

I used to occasionally walk this road from our house in Cathlamet after Stacey left for school. Before it was black-topped in the 1980’s, it was a primitive rough gravel road that was barely maintained by the county. I always had a gypsy soul and wandering feet; and I liked this view of the Columbia River seen from the top of Beaver Creek Road before it drops into Mill Creek road at the bottom junction - I only ever walked down to that junction if I was a glutton for punishment because the climb back UP that steep incline is pure hell on the hamstrings: very punishing hike up that unforgiving incline.

Leaving one county and entering another: both home.

While cruising along Eufaula Heights, I decided spur-of-the-moment, to nip into an old friend’s place and let him know of Bob’s graduation – and invite him to Bob’s Celebration of Life event if he wants to join us – our lives had gone in different directions over the years, but when I stepped out of my car, and we saw each other, it was like time hadn’t passed at all …

Driving down an old friend's driveway. There are memories centered around Bob here too … we lived on this property for a few months in 1995 when we moved to Longview from Raymond, where we had been for 2 years after leaving Cathlamet in 1993. One night I had to walk the dogs and I had our granddaughter with me; it was Winter time, so I strapped her to my chest in her little carry thingee, under my coat leaving it unzipped enough to give her fresh air to breathe, and took the dogs out. It was very foggy, so it took me a few minutes to realize I had inadvertently walked right into the middle of a huge elk herd: I could literally have reached out my hands and touched elk on all sides of us! I told those dogs to tread carefully ... and they were as good as gold, thank Elohei. We all made it safely back to our humble abode, without undue incident; Elohim sent our Guardian Angels to walk with us that night.

We got to talking, and 4 hours passed! We talked about Bob, and the man we both knew him to be; and we both affirmed that we know where Bob is now.

And we had a LOT of catching-up to do.

Even with the surprising and disappointing changes to the old hometown, yesterday was a very GOOD day on many levels.

I am looking forward to more Sunday Fundays :-D