Just East of Eden : LIFE IMPACTS

Wednesday, January 5, 2022

LIFE IMPACTS

Today’s post is inspired by things that impact our life.

Today’s post is also an encouragement to remember that no matter what happens in our lives, there is always an up-side 😉

Two days ago, I was notified that someone I used to be very close to was in the hospital – as was her husband. For several hours, conflicting reports were sent my way; family secrets were revealed, angry tears flooded my ears, frustrated musings significantly warmed the airwaves. By the time I set the cell phone on its charger to recharge, I had a roaring headache.

Last night before I went to bed, I was notified that said persons mentioned above were pulling through, after all. My feelings are mixed (1) I know this couple, and their family: they live on drama … if they aren’t “dying!” they don’t how to live; for true (2) I don’t like their trauma drama; and I resented being pulled into it. Again; on the pretext, “it’s real this time” (3) There is a valid reason these people are no longer an active part of my life.

IF they were truly “fighting for their lives!” (which conflicting report should be believed?), then I felt sad for their family; if on the other hand, this was just another jacked-up trauma drama episode …

These are people that will run through the house screaming, “Fire! Fire!” – and when everyone is standing outside in bare feet, in freezing weather, they will laugh at their childish behavior and say, “Just joking, hahaha.”

Them being in the hospital is factual.

Them “dying!” is the glitch.

Before you think me heartless, let me clarify: they are always dying. For 40 years it’s been the same scenario.

This time, I’ve reached my limit.

I don’t want to be dealing with this anymore.

I have my own traumas I’m working my way through.

I haven’t seen these people for years – and my life has been less stressful; that is a good feeling.

So, last night I made another culling decision: I blocked everyone involved: on social media sources, as well as from my phone. That action made me realize that there isn’t much of my old life left in my new life anymore.

Actions have consequences – consequences have impact.

I don’t regret the culling. And I don’t care if people think that is a callous thing to do.

I.d.o.n’t.w.a.n.t.d.r.a.m.a.i.n.m.y.l.i.f.e.a.n.y.m.o.r.e.

Sometimes I think the best route to take, is to make a clean break – a total break (from everyone) – from the life I know … just wipe it out, and start completely fresh. With no guilt, of any kind.

I think I’ve reached the point where it would be an easy thing to do; I have nothing to lose, and everything to gain. The primary gain would be peace of mind, and tranquility in the golden years of my life.