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Wednesday, January 16, 2019


I drove into town early this morning to mail off the bundles of paperwork various medical businesses this week are demanding … it was costly; $5 a bundle, and I had 3! If it wasn’t for good and close friends I would not have been able to pay the postage because I will not receive any income at all until March sometime; but the paperwork is in the mail now and hopefully the issues will be settled once and for all: PLEASE GOD! It is hurtful to my heart every time I have to make copies of my husband’s Death Certificate and send it out to some governmental/business oriented moron that does not seem to understand or care how hurtful it is to me to keep reliving his death to satisfy their morbid curiosities. And do the same dimwits actually believe that widows have ready funds to cater to their whims? Obviously none of these organizations are talking to each other – or they are just plain heartless: I lean towards the last few words.

That done, I went uphill to Keenagers again today – the message, based on the Good Samaritan gospel story (Luke 10:25-37), was an answer to my morning prayer, the fellowship was good as always, and the songs uplifting … and I broke down in tears missing my husband (probably brought on by the morning’s stressful mailings minutes earlier). It is good to be among friends who understand and need no apologies.

When I got home and checked the mail, I had a notification from the Social Security Administration informing me that my husband had a payment pending at the time of his death that wasn’t sent out, and that I have the right to claim it. But first I have to again rush off some paperwork to them. Within a 5 day period. The letter was sent to me January 13th, and today is the 16th. That means I have 2 days to get it back to them. 2 days. So I have to rush out the door tomorrow morning to try to beat the morning rush at the downtown Social Security Office and hope for an extension – if I end up dealing with the steely-eyed-tarter I dealt with previously (https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/01/grief-hurts.html), the extension is highly unlikely. Then I have to rush to Tumwater … a 2 hour drive (my stepson will be going with me because I hate freeway & city driving; he will be driving an additional sacrificial 2 hours up here from his home in Salem, Oregon) … to get a Certified Copy of our Marriage License, and I am hoping that my Birth Certificate Copy will be sufficient (it has the Illinois State Seal stamp on it, so it is Certified already), otherwise I have to call Illinois and get it from that State; which will delay the receiving of it by a few weeks, which will delay the quick reply process demanded by the Social Security Administration. And I am not happy to be sending them my copy of my Birth Certificate – it is the only one I have: but it is what they want. And I will have to send it if the local Office tarter does not act like a decent human being tomorrow and give me that extension I will be asking for. At any rate I have to go to Tumwater. And I hope I will get back in time for the Grief Support Group – I have a pick-up-ride arriving at my home at 5:45 p.m. so the timing will be tight and stressful; I may have to call from Tumwater and cancel the meet …

Alex is doing familial ancestry research, so I scanned and copied off for him some of the family information I have collected over the years; plus his father’s recent Death Certificate, Birth Certificate, and our Marriage License – while I am not his mother, I am his father’s widow and our union is family history, so it applies.

While I was in the TV Room making those copies, I happened to glance up at the ceiling – no particular reason – and noticed a CRACK running the entire length of the ceiling!

And it continued into the hallway too …

When it rains here, it freaking pours.

Help me Yeshua.

During the crack upset, I got my Wednesday “check-up calls”: the first with Alex while we talked about the Tumwater trip tomorrow/family history/ceiling crack; and the second from Tiffany, doing her part to uphold our agreement ;-)

And I reminded myself that Elohim’s grace is sufficient for me no matter what today’s happenings dropped at my feet (https://jeastofeden.blogspot.com/2019/01/his-grace-is-sufficient-for-me.html)

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