Wedding Song - God Knew That I Needed You

Monday, August 24, 2020

RESPECT YOURSELF


I did get out of town Sunday afternoon ... but, it was not a "Sunday~Funday" - it was an escape before I was fitted for striped Big House PJ's.

Decided to go to Jewell half way through the morning text.

I was so blown away by Trudy’s hostility that I set the GPS for my destination, so all I had to do was  lean back in my seat and enjoy the scenery flashing by; without thinking too much – I was giving my brain a rest from all the covid hysteria that has gripped this nation … and I wanted to sort through what had happened in the text without overthinking the situation.

I am trying to rebuild a new life with new people in that new life: there are going to be a lot of false starts. I don’t want to get stuck in the “whys”, “wtf just happened”, or “if only”: life is a cycling process. It’s going to take a while to find the right fit …


The GPS directions would have taken me to Jewell quicker, but I chose an alternate route: I needed the longer route to unwind. Country roads chill me.
To my way of thinking, people can be friends without high school silliness. I am an adult; I can be friends with people ... without embracing ALL their friends – apparently, some can’t.
People set boundaries for a reason. And people jump boundaries for their own reasons ... I don't play games with boundary jumpers: if my refusal to play boundary games makes me "unreasonable" - so be it.
Bob & I were best friends - but we didn't live in each other's pockets. I guess I still expect that kind of respect for my boundaries. I don't understand the obsession some people have with forced friendships.
I don't have a problem putting distance between myself and domineering people ... and that went into speedy effect this morning.

Following the heated morning text, and spending solo lobo time unwinding in Jewell, questions I had been juggling with were settled; and a friend with a dominating spirit was set free to go step on someone else who will allow it. I'm not sorry she was in my life - we were good for each other for the better part of this year: but life shifts and friendships change. I am learning that in the language of today, when someone says, "I don't like conflict" ... what they are really telling me is, "I don't want you to disagree with me".

As demoncrat governors drag their covid craziness on, and on and on … I’m losing interest with people and social group things that see no foreseeable end of the closures in sight

I don't do well with being told what I have to accept - no matter who says it to me. If the topic or situation is something I will NEVER accept, I will NOT accept it no matter how much bullying goes into the attempt to sway me.

A few months ago, another friend tried to bully me into accepting the black live matter violence in seattle ... she was set free: I wish her well, and hope she comes to her senses; but I don't need her oprah, dr. phil, dr. oz, the view, cbs, nbc, or msnbc "education" in my life. This morning, another friend was cut loose for the same tactics (different topic/same maneuvers).


I can’t hike with Trudy now; she has seriously offended me in the way she has inserted herself into a situation and topic she has no right to have an opinion on - solely because she is brown-nosing the Park Manager.
There is a delicate balance between sharing your life with others and keeping your own emotional and spiritual balance balanced. Boundaries are important to keep things balanced.
I am surprised at how dominating the new people can be when I let them a mere inch into my life.
I do actually enjoy solitude ... and I do actually enjoy some people in my life. But I don't make room for overbearing and disrespectful people. My circle is small: very small. Because most people are boundary jumpers. I have no problem at all cutting disrespectful people cold ... and walking away like a boss.
This is why people - in general - annoy me ... they take too much onto themselves concerning what they think should concern me. I don't like people ram-rodding me.

Life shifts, and friendships change (currently mine are lasting about 6 months on average); but I will ALWAYS STAY TRUE TO ME. I value me, even if no one else does. I'm not a very good follower ... I will walk alongside as an equal - but I do not follow very well. I seriously start bucking when unequally balanced.

Now I KNOW where this road goes ... and I KNOW HOW it ties IN TO the OTHER 2 routes. Thank You, Yeshua! 

At the end of the day, you have to live with YOU – respect yourself because others won't in today's climate of fearmongering and aimless hate. You can live without the “fringe” factors of life … but you have to live with yourself: you can’t do that successfully unless you hold power to your own life.

RESPECT YOURSELF:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-1pYKdqD1ls


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