A lot of what I post since
becoming a solo lobo sojourner through life sounds pretty redundant. And it IS.
That is the litany of Widowhood.
All we have left of the love/life we had before our new life is memories: memories ARE redundant. We repeat ourselves A LOT because (1) we never want to forget our spouse, and verbal repetition keeps them alive – to us … to others (2) hearing what we say out loud HELPS US FOCUS; our spouse is no longer with us as a balancing sounding board – and the kids and grandkids have made themselves scarce (3) friends are far and few between … and most of them are still physically coupled – their lives have not been severely altered. Comprehension of widowhood is fuzzy and uncomfortable for family & friends to contemplate.
So, to save our sanity we solo lobos are often redundant.
To successfully forge ahead and not get lost in sorrow … we occasionally revisit our old life to strengthen our courage: we lapse into redundancy, and a lengthy discourse of our spouse’s virtues, strengths, and character. This is how we shore up the emotional bulwark we need, to victoriously walk through this new life of ours.
I love you,
Babe.
Always ~ OX
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